How to take care of yourself when you have the winter blues
How to take care of yourself when you have the winter blues
Once the holidays pass and deep winter sets in, it's easy to forget that this is traditionally the season to slow down and rest.
Especially because we’re inundated with posts and workshops about setting goals and making plans for the new year.
Extra especially because most modern-day cultures and economies do not shift with the natural seasons. Can you imagine Walmart or Target and the oil industry opting to slow down or close? Ha.
However, nature doesn’t stay at top speed and max growth all year round. And guess what? As human beings, we are nature!
That’s why millions of people in America alone experience winter blues. Or more intensely, "seasonal affective disorder", also known as "seasonal depression.”
As business owners, it can feel extremely difficult to slow down. But it doesn’t have to be.
You have a unique opportunity to create a culture within your life and your business to shift with the seasons.
You became a small business owner to do this exact thing.
How to “beat” the winter blues
I'm just going to go ahead and say it: I hate the cold.
In the winter, my body hurts, I'm not motivated at all, and I just want to eat a bunch of food and hibernate. My husband basically has to drag me out of the house to get outside because of how much I hate the cold.
If you’re with me or you typically have lower energy and motivation in the winter months, you are not alone. Millions of people experience a sort of winter blues or seasonal depression. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for wanting and/or needing to slow down in the winter.
In fact, I’d say you’re extremely in tune with yourself and I’m celebrating that about you.
Understanding why the winter blues happens to you
Internal and external factors greatly affect how we manage our time, get things done, and achieve our goals. In order to more holistically manage your time, taking them into account is extremely important. Want some examples?
Internal factors are our mental health, physical health, energy levels, menstrual cycle (if you have one), and more.
External factors are like the weather, our physical space, astrology (if you believe in astrology as I do), geographical allocation of resources, policies, and more.
As humans, we can’t ignore them. We have to work with them, including during the winter.
When you think of wintertime, what do you think of?
Cold weather
Long and dark days
Trees, plants, and things that have died off and don't grow for months
Animals hibernate or migrate to warmer places
Death and decay
Slowing down
Sleeping
Wintertime as an external factor causes a major shift in our bodies where they want to slow down and rest more.
So when winter rolls around and you have a ton on your plate, big goals, packed schedule… your body wants to do the exact opposite. This makes it extremely difficult for you to feel motivated, get focused, and be productive in the same way as other seasons.
Feel the urge to slow down, a lack of motivation, or an increase in negative self-talk in the winter months?
Then you are someone who is impacted by seasonal changes, and it’s extremely important to learn how to work with this external factor.
Shift your mindset around beating the blues
Most articles talk about beating the blues as if you’re in a fight against yourself. That’s not helpful for anyone.
You don’t have to beat the blues. You don’t have to be productive right now. You can rest more, and still be successful.
Shifting your mindset around beating the winter blues looks like:
Not suppressing the urge to rest and forcing yourself to work at high speed.
Letting go of the pressure to operate at the same speed you might during other times of the year.
Taking the best care of yourself through it…which typically means slowing down, a lot.
Doing what you need to do to come out on the other end prepared and ready for the next season to begin.
Listen to your body
Winter is the best season to practice being more mindful and listening to what your body needs. Your body wants to slow down, wants care, and wants ______. (You fill in the blank: What does your body need right now?) Mine needs a NAP.
This season is also a great time to lower self-expectations, do the bare minimum, reflect on your life or business, watch Netflix without feeling guilty, or just sit in front of a fireplace and chill.
Doing the bare minimum, slowing down, and resting might feel challenging at first. Listen to what your body needs and wants, and let go of the rest of the stuff until there's more sunlight.
Welcome this opportunity to rest and recharge because it doesn’t come very often in our society and our businesses.
Max out your sunlight time
Keep as many window shades as you can open as much as possible to allow more sunlight into your home.
When you feel brave, bundle up and get outside. I try to as much as possible but as I said, I really hate the cold. But, whenever I actually go outside it really helps me.
Prioritize movement & nourishment
I typically prioritize movement all year round, but I have to even more in the winter because I just want to sit on the couch and do nothing. So, I create a list of all the current ways I love to move my body and schedule them 3-4x a week in my calendar when I’m most energized and motivated.
Then, I incorporate warmth. This looks like going to hot yoga, exercising in front of a heater, or bundling up and getting outside. But I try to move 3-4 times a week, even if it's just like dancing around my house for a couple of minutes.
By the way, there are some awesome gentle & free movement classes on YouTube. Click here for my personal playlist of yoga and mindful movement classes.
Another thing that I prioritize all year round, but especially so in the winter is eating healthy and taking vitamins. In the winter when we’re feeling less likely to move our bodies and eat healthily, even just taking vitamin D and C helps me feel like I’m doing everything I can to stay healthy and well.
How might you prioritize taking care of your body in the winter?
Make loving decisions for you & your business
What I mean by this is making decisions that are grounded in self-love. If taking a trip to a warmer climate (COVID permitting) would be loving, do it. If taking a nap would be loving, do it. If it feels like you’re forcing yourself to move and eat healthily, don’t do it.
If taking a bunch of stuff off your to-do list is loving, do it. If saying no to another client is loving, great. If you don’t feel like marketing right now, that’s cool.
Use this season to be more loving towards yourself in the decisions you make.
Additional external support
In the winter, I seek out more support than in other seasons of the year.
I am a huge advocate of getting support whether it be from a therapist, coach, friend, or something else. Especially if you’re winter blues is intense.
Why? Because sharing with someone else the shoulds I feel to do more in the winter helps me release them.
Consider investing in some accountability or external support around this time to make sure that you take really good care of yourself, in the winter specifically.
How will you “beat the blues?”
Recognizing you have the winter blues and taking care of yourself throughout the winter is how you can beat the blues, successfully manage your business, and be prepared and ready spring.
What specifically will you do to beat the blues? Comment below on what you are going to do differently this year.
Want support with shifting with the seasons so you can successfully run your business and take really good care of yourself? I can help! Click here to book a free consult call.
Why taking time off is so hard and how to do it without feeling guilty
Why taking time off is so hard and how to do it without feeling guilty
Resting and taking time off is not exactly glamorous or sexy. But… Do you know what is?
Feeling energized, motivated, and joyful on a regular basis. And being successful without having to work all the time.
If that's what you're into or looking for, taking time off and rest is non-negotiable. So why is it so challenging to put everything aside and make time for you?
By the end of this blog, you will understand why it's so hard for you to take time away from your business and what to do about it.
Why is taking time off so hard (even when you plan for it)?
Puppies.
Confused? Let me explain.
If you’ve ever had a puppy, you know how much work they are. It makes me tired just thinking about getting one.
Your whole life revolves around your precious new pup. You have to continuously take care of it and train it so it doesn’t go to the bathroom inside. It wakes you up all hours of the night. When you go to work, you have to put your puppy in a crate so it doesn’t chew your entire living room apart.
Guess what happens when you are done with work?
Your puppy is so excited to see you! But you can’t just flop on the couch and relax… your puppy NEEDS to use the bathroom and run around to get all its energy out.
Now, imagine that your mind is that puppy.
You’ve been working, doing, and going for your entire life keeping your thoughts and feelings in that metaphorical crate. When you take time off, you’re confronted with all of it.
Resting is not a piece of cake
Hustle culture, societal and familial norms, self and other people’s expectations, and basically everything that we’ve been taught since the first grade is to get things done.
Our entire economy is based on labor and output, with one goal in mind: non-stop growth.
Our minds are wired to constantly think about all the things we have to do.
That's why so many people say they feel lazy or behind when they pause, take time off, and rest. And that’s why it feels so much easier to continue to work and stay busy until you basically HAVE to rest (equivalent to burnout).
Now you might have some more clarity around why it’s so difficult to rest. However, logically even when you know something, it can still be incredibly difficult to do
Especially when you are an entrepreneur and you feel like your business will fall apart when you take time away from it. If you feel like this, there are many different things you can do to let go of that misunderstanding. Click here to find out how I can help you create a healthy foundation for you to take time away from your business.
If resting is hard for you and you want to learn more about how our societal norms, capitalism, racism, and the patriarchy impact your ability to rest, follow the nap ministry. They have taught me so much!
What’s possible when you take time for you?
When you pause, take time for yourself, and rest you get to sit with yourself.
You get to notice and feel your feelings.
You get to examine, reflect, acknowledge, and celebrate yourself.
You get to notice what’s going well, and what needs to change.
It might feel like a lot. Just like a real puppy, when it first gets out your thoughts and feelings may feel overwhelming. But by continuing to work and delaying time off, you keep your metaphorical puppy in its crate dying to get out.
That’s why I recommend having someone to support you through this journey.
Curious about what’s waiting on the other side of the initial puppy wild energy?
When you take more time off, you’ll be able to…
Be present for the things that deeply matter to you (your loved ones, your health, etc.)
Regularly feel refreshed, energized, and creative (not only to be more productive later).
Heal any underlying feelings of unworthiness, scarcity, and insufficiency.
Start feeling more fulfilled, alive, and successful.
Shift your mindset around time so every day doesn’t feel like a stressful high-speed race.
Find what being content and at peace looks like to you.
Start believing in things like divine timing and increase your patience.
Begin to feel more confident in yourself and how you spend your time.
Increase your self-trust, self-discipline, and self-love.
The list goes on and on.
However, I always say when you regularly rest and take time for yourself, you begin truly living.
If you want any or all of those things, learning how to take more time off and be with yourself is your answer.
How do you take guilt-free time off?
There are some tangible solutions and non-tangible solutions. And the solutions you need are completely unique to you, your business, and your life.
How you might create more time off and rest without feeling guilty could look like:
Identifying that you have a desire to make more time for yourself.
If you often say or feel, “I never have enough time,” healing a time scarcity mindset.
Setting and keeping firmer boundaries around your time off.
Aligning your schedule and working hours.
Adopting a mindfulness practice to handle the thoughts and feelings that come up when you rest.
If you can’t rest because you need to work to pay the bills, figure out how much money you actually need to create a plan and schedule to reach that number.
Learning how to be more compassionate with yourself because you can’t heal guilt with more guilt.
Planning your time more realistically (no more overcommitting and over-scheduling).
Ask yourself, “What might be my next step so I can rest and reap the benefits of guilt-free time off?”
As a holistic time coach, discovering how to reach your goals and take more guilt-free time off is one of the ways I help the business owners I work with.
If you’re ready to go from "I never have enough time" to at peace and fulfilled with what gets done in your 24 hours, including rest and time off… schedule a free no-pressure consult call now.
Why toxic productivity is actually getting in the way of your success
Why toxic productivity is actually getting in the way of your success
Today's post is a bit vulnerable and scary because as a time management coach I'm sharing with you my biggest time management mistake.
I’m sharing it with you because hopefully, you resonate with me. By the end of this post, you will also know how it is costing you so much time + energy in your life and business.
So when lockdown started I got at least 10 emails from a bunch of different companies offering free art classes, finance classes, knitting classes, and all these different things that I could do.
Now that I “had the time” guess what I did? I signed up for all of them.
Deep down I felt that I needed to make the most of this time now that we were stuck inside of our homes.
If you felt this way too, comment below just to tell me “Yes, I feel you Becca.” Tell me I'm not alone in this!
This is a super small example of a bigger picture issue that we have as humans in our society today. On a normal basis, pre-pandemic pre-COVID, we are bombarded with productivity hacks, tips, tricks, and tools to make every moment productive as possible. If you google productivity, you will get around 500 million results.
When we are students in school, as children, we are rewarded for getting the most done, the quickest possible, the best output. We're impressed by people who can pull all-nighters. In our industry, entrepreneurs boast about working 80 hours a week and never sleeping or having time for themselves.
Rarely do we celebrate people who have a healthy work balance, who get a good night's sleep, who take care of themselves and have tons of time off to rest and to do whatever they want.
So when the pandemic hit globally, in the United States, many of us didn't have our commutes to our nine to fives anymore. We didn't have plans to go out with friends or spend time with family that didn’t live with us. We had “nothing else to do”, so we could finally get to all of the house projects, courses, books, starting the business, and growing exponentially.
—> A statistic that just backs up what I'm saying is Home Depot increase its revenue by 20% from February 2020 to January 2021. They made 132 billion dollars in revenue.
At the same time, companies and many people felt like our focus, energy, and output would be the exact same or somehow even better during a really traumatic, huge shift in everyday life. So many people lost loved ones, got sick, and lost jobs. Yet we continue to expect ourselves to be productive at the expense of our humanness.
Since lockdown began, it became clear to so many people that toxic productivity is our biggest time management mistake as a society. And it was mine too, even being someone who knew how important resting and taking time off is. Even as a time management coach, I was still pressuring myself to be productive at the expense of the things that I thought I valued and cared about.
The mistake of toxic productivity
Why is toxic productivity a mistake?
A business owner I have worked with recently asked me why is it such a mistake or why is it a bad thing that I want to be productive and work. My answer was, “there is nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with wanting to grow the thing that you are passionate about, the business, the life that you are trying to create. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be productive, it's when it becomes toxic.”
When it becomes toxic, you only care about productivity, making every single moment productive and have an output or result you are chasing after something that is not really ever going to happen.
We believe this fallacy of productivity, that we'll finally get everything on our to-do list done one day. So we're always doing more, more, more, and more to try and get to that one day where we can rest, take time off, and make time for ourselves.
Productivity becomes toxic when all you do is try and get to that one day. That's what creates a hamster wheel because it never happens. Your to-do list will never end and when you believe you'll finally get to that one day, the things that you do get done never feel like enough.
All of that creates a lot of self-confidence issues, it causes unhealthy self-care habits, you start to put your worth into your productivity and the output that you create.
That has a lot of detrimental impacts on your business and your life.
In my personal experience, I was in the hospital with an intestine infection, never really having major health issues before. I developed a severe intestine infection and was in the hospital trying to meet a deadline! I had my computer with me in the hospital trying to work on an essay. At the time I was in college as an engineering student. I didn't really care about English at all (sorry to my teacher) and yet, I was unconsciously choosing to be productive over resting and caring about myself.
That's how bad it can get. Obviously, that is a pretty severe "rock bottom” in terms of burnout and productivity. It doesn't have to be severe at all it can just be you unable to sit on the couch and enjoy an evening with your family or even with yourself.
How to know if your productivity is toxic?
You have trouble sitting still and resting.
You continue to work when you know that you're tired, achy, and not in the mood to work.
You feel like being bored is a bad thing.
There's this just constant need for self-improvement, just more, more and more which leads to a lot of impacts on our mental and physical health like depression, anxiety, and strained relationships.
Choosing work over yourself and which leads to a lot of self-mistrust.
That's my experience and that is the experience of many of the clients that I work with.
How to reverse the impacts of toxic productivity
If you relate to any of the things that I just mentioned, I want to share with you two super simple things that I had to do and that I help the folks do in my coaching program. There are so many things that you can do to start reversing the impacts of toxic productivity and hustle culture.
1.The first thing that you can do is reframing what productive means to you.
A lot of times we think that just resting, relaxing, and spending time with family isn't productive and I would love to cut that out, it is 100% productive. Anything that is of value or importance to you is productive. Being alive, being a human, it's not just about work, it is not just creating results and output. Anything that means something to you is productive and I will say this over and over and over and over and over again.
Once you figure out what is of value or what is important to you then just remind yourself every time that you spend time on those things, you're being productive!
2. The second tip that I want to share with you is, the best lifestyle is a healthy lifestyle.
There are so many statistics and studies coming out around how being healthy is the best thing you can do for work, productivity, your business, for yourself, for your family.
When you are falling into the biggest time management mistake, aka toxic productivity, you put work over health, work over self. Putting your health number one is the most basic thing that you can do to step off the hamster wheel.
At the end of the day, we need to rest, we need to train ourselves to put ourselves first.
The next question that you are going to ask me is how, how do I reframe what's productive? How do I put myself first? How do I create a healthier work-life balance?
There is no one solution. I can't give you in this short post what the how is. The how comes from inside of you, it is unique to you.
This is beautiful because that means it's going to work, you just have to figure out what is inside of you and how to make that happen. So if you want to step off of the toxic productivity hamster wheel, if you want to be mentally and physically healthier and happier. If you want to be more compassionate with yourself. And if you want to feel like there is all of the time in the world for everything that you need to get done… the answers are inside of you. And I can support you in unearthing your answers in my 1:1 coaching program.
I know how hard it is to peel yourself away from your laptop, from work, from the business that you're building. I know how hard it is when you know how toxic a productivity mindset can be and yet still fall victim to it and not be able to rest, take time off and put yourself first. So if that's you, you are in good company here. Trust me when I say that I am here to help you break up with toxic productivity and step off that hamster wheel so you can start resting and start living life in the way that you want to.
If you resonated with my biggest time management mistake, let me know in the comments below.
Ready to heal time scarcity and live into your values? Click here to get free + supportive resources!
4 Personalized steps to get back on track when your day gets derailed
4 Personalized steps to get back on track when your day gets derailed
Don’t you think that life seems to have completely different plans than us some days?
You just want to know how to get back on track when the day seems to just get away from you, that's why you clicked on this blog post and I got you!
At the end of this post, you are going to have a super short and quick plan for what to do when your day gets completely thrown off.
Ok so, the kids are sick, you get stuck down a social media rabbit hole for an hour or two, you forgot about a meeting, your dog needs to go to the vet, maybe you just had a bad night of sleep last night and you're in a crappy mood today?
Let's be real, COVID has derailed over an entire year of our lives too!
It never feels good when you make plans and yet you can't do it because of some of the things I just mentioned. It feels like you only get an hour of real work in a day. Ugh.
Personally speaking, in my life when my day gets derailed or my schedule gets derailed it's because I just don't feel like doing something. I wanted to bring that up because sometimes it's not external, maybe it's internal and oftentimes I blame myself. I can get into those shame and blame cycles of “oh it's my fault that my schedule got thrown off, I could have if I had more self-discipline or actually followed through”.
Like I talked about in the procrastination blog post (if you haven't read it, check it out!) it's okay to let things marinate, sit, enjoy the creative process, and give things more time. Sometimes the longer you wait to do something some beautiful ideas might come from that time.
How to get back on track
Let's get right to the solution, how to get back on track, and then I want to share with you how to prevent it in the future so things don't go haywire as often as they are right now.
1. When you notice that your day has been derailed, pause.
Awareness is the first piece, you have to notice that everything got thrown off or something happened that doesn't go according to plan. Honor it, honor this, it sucks big time when you create plans and they don't happen according to the plan that you want.
2. After you pause, ask yourself what do I need to do right here at this moment to get it back on track?
Instead of ruminating and sitting in the why is this happening to me and why can't I control everything, start just by asking yourself, “what I can do right here in this present moment? What can I do to get it back feeling good, feeling easeful, or accomplishing what I need to accomplish?”
Oftentimes for me, it's yoga, breathing, taking time to journal, talk to a friend, whatever I need to just like get back in my body.
3. Ask yourself, can you do what you need?
Can you actually do that yoga class, can you breathe, can you call a friend, can you take a nap. If so…
4. Do it!
If you can’t, go back and ask yourself “okay, so what can I do? How do I get my day back on track, what do I need to feel better?”
How do you prevent your day from being derailed?
So that is what you need to do when your day is derailed but how do you prevent your schedule, plans, and your day from being derailed in the future?
Something that my clients and I often talk about is that whenever your day or plans get derailed it is because of high expectations and this illusion of control over your time, the day, or your schedule. It's the high stakes and the pressure that we put on ourselves to be perfect.
As much as we love being in control we have to realize that, at some point, we're just not. So shifting your mindset to being more human, being more flexible, being more compassionate is going to take you to have more success.
Every single time that you create a plan add extra space for things to move around. Or simply knowing that your plans 99% most likely will shift and that is what it is. That is what being human is about.
So tangibly this is why I love digital calendars because when you put your to-do list in your calendar you can move your tasks around and still have a visual that it IS possible to still get everything done.
Also, you can create extra space in between tasks, client calls, meetings, etc. That's the beautiful part about your digital calendar too. When you create more space you allow yourself to live, you allow more compassion, ease, and space. And that is so beautiful.
No matter if you are trying to figure out how to get back on track and taking care of yourself at this moment reading this post or you are attempting to be more proactive in your scheduling. Or in your time management to allow derails to affect you less and less. You are adding more compassion to your day and to your life so that needs to be celebrated. That is going to help you so so much in your business, your life, your relationships, your health and you'll be more productive (that’s like the understatement here).
I help people be more productive but at the end of the day, it's more about compassion, just being human, and living our lives. That is possible when you are flexible and intuitive with your time. If you enjoyed this post leave a comment below sharing what your biggest takeaway from this post was and what you are going to do to make a shift in your life, whether it's on the mindset side or, the tool side.
Want to feel confident, in control, and at peace with your time? Click here to get free + supportive resources!
The five minute mindfulness meditation for when you feel like quitting
The 5 minute mindfulness meditation for when you feel like quitting
I've 100% had moments that I wanted to quit my business!
I wanted to just run away, throw in the towel, and just, not have to deal with it anymore…
It was just too complicated and too much. If you have been in that situation or if you're in that situation right now, at this moment, I want you to know that it is 100% normal to have this experience when you are starting your business!
I made this 5-minute meditation for you so you can come back to who you are deep down. You can release any of the things that are weighing you down. You can come back to why you started your business in the first place so you can be re-motivated, reinvigorated, reignited in your passions and your drive to change the world + to do amazing things with your business.
If when you feel like quitting or it's just too much for you, come back to this 5-minute meditation, come back to this exercise. Just take a few minutes to go inwards, to breathe, be with yourself. That is the most beautiful thing that you can do to take care of yourself.
For whatever reason, if you feel like quitting your business and you need support. Someone to help you go inwards and figure out what's going on and how to be more intentional with your time so you don't feel so overwhelmed and like it's just too much to handle I’m here to support you.
Want to feel confident, in control, and at peace with your time? Click here to get free + supportive resources!
5 Planner tips you need to create more ease in your business and life
5 Planner tips you need to create more ease in your business and life
So the other day I was scrolling on Facebook (yes I know!) and I realized that it was that time of year when everyone is looking for a perfect planner for the next year.
Don't get me wrong, planners are awesome (you know I have one, and I'm gonna get into why I have one in a little bit). But in this post, I'm going to share with you why your 2021 planner won't make you more productive and what to do with your planner if you do get one.
This way you will actually be more productive without hustling, without burning yourself out.
Comment below if you are getting a 2021 planner and want to use it better!
Reason #1) Your expectations for the year to come
The question that I want to ask you is…
How many years have you gotten a new planner, set big goals for the year, and then halfway through you realize that you're not even working on your goals and you beat yourself up over it?
In the past, whenever I got a new planner, I would open it up, I would be so excited, I'd have all these amazing intentions for how to spend my time to be able to reach the goals that I have set.
As you can imagine, you know what happens next, I get off track, something shifts. Something comes up and prevents me from reaching my goals. Whatever the case may be, I did not follow the perfect plan that I created in January and then I feel like I'm the one to blame. I am discouraged, I beat myself up over it and that's not the full truth of what actually happened.
But there are so many reasons why we don't follow through with our original plans and goals that we set. And if 2020 has taught us anything about the world is that everything shifts. We need to be flexible with our goals, with our plans, with our schedules.
So, if you often find yourself in that cycle of setting huge brand new goals and getting super excited at the beginning of the year, and then beating yourself up for not being able to follow through with it, know that this is a super common cycle that we are all set to.
I am bringing this up now because, if you go into your planner before setting your huge high expectation goals for the year, you can come into it with full awareness of this cycle and set better goals.
Personally, I don't set annual goals. There's a ton of research and reasons why but what I personally use and teach in my business is quarter planning. So I have rough intentions of what I want my life to look like in a year but I never set hard goals or hard plans for the year.
I do them in quarter chunks because I know that things are going to shift internally, inside of myself the goals that I want to achieve and externally, around us.
If you have not planned quarterly yet and you're in this cycle, I would definitely tell you to look into planning quarterly instead of annually. Sign up for my Q1 Planning workshop by clicking here.
Glorified to-do lists
The next reason why your 2021 planner won't make you more productive is that usually planners are just glorified to-do lists.
They're just pretty books that we write down lists in and lists don't work. They're good for a single purpose of just brain dumping but lists don't actually show us how much time we have and when we're actually going to get those tasks on our list done.
I want to talk about the concept of a to-do list. To-do lists focus our attention and energy on all of the things that we have not done yet. This leaves us with this unaccomplished, unfulfilled, continue to beat yourself up, burned out, hustling type mindset and mentality, when our to-do lists never end.
I don't know a single person that is more productive when they feel behind, exhausted, and can never get enough stuff done. For the people who are reading this and you’re thinking “oh my planner has places for me to write in my gratitude for the day, my top three” and all these other things that aren't just a to-do list, those are still things that you need to fill in and that you are going to beat yourself up about for not completing every single day.
I have so many clients and people in my personal life that tell me “Oh I'm bad because I didn't fill out my gratitude in my big three years”. Whatever you want to call it of the day. Bottom line is that planners often make us feel like a failure or not good enough. So that is not going to make you more productive.
I could talk about how to make to-do lists better for days and how to actually complete your to-do list without feeling crappy about yourself, which I have tons of blogs on... What I'll say here is that we need to pay more attention and energy to the things that we have accomplished and that we have gotten done. This is the opposite of feeling crappy about yourself. When you focus, acknowledge, reflect, and celebrate on all the things that you have done, you are more motivated, energized, fulfilled. All of those feelings, are what you need to feel to continue that momentum and continue to get things done.
In the beginning, I told you that I have a planner. Yes, I do have a paper planner but guess what I use my paper planner to do? I write all the things that I have done or I spent my time on. If I skip a day, I don’t beat myself up over it. I either go back and fill it in or I literally just not fill it in because it doesn't define my worth.
You can read this post all about the three things most people miss when they write a to-do list. It will help you figure out maybe some things that you need to start incorporating into your time management systems and organization.
Our planners don’t include rest time
The third reason why your 2021 planner will not make you more productive is that our planners don't mention rest. Most of the time, a lot of people have a hard time resting, if it's even possible for them to rest. Even though the majority of us probably know that resting and taking time away from our to-do lists and our tasks is what is actually going to make us more productive, we still can't do it.
In sense, our planners do not encourage us to rest, to have quality time with our family, to knit, to watch Netflix…yet again.
Our planners encourage us to stay exhausted, burnt out, hustling, and focusing on the things that we have not done yet so it makes rest even harder for us.
Again, those things are not going to make you more productive. So what to do instead is to have rest included in your planner. If it's not already, we need to shift our mindset to making rest and quality time with ourselves and our loved ones a non-negotiable that comes first before anything else, if it's possible for you.
Obviously, we need to work enough to survive to pay our bills. Which is a whole other discussion around how our society is keeping us in these vicious cycles. However, we all can take a moment, whether it's just a second to take a deep breath. That needs to be in our planners, our schedules and that needs to be non-negotiable.
The mindset shift that I needed to make in my life is that my to-do list, my tasks will truly never end. That is literally being alive, we are human.
The things that we need to do will never cease to exist. So we need to understand that in order to think “Okay, I can take some time, put my to-do list aside and actually rest”. When we have a mindset that thinks “when I just finish xyz then I can rest”, there's no finishing, there's no end, there's no being done.
I'll just say here as a caution or a warning sign is that when you start to rest it's going to feel uncomfortable. When you do try to rest and relax, your brain starts racing. That is the conditioning inside of us around working, just know that you are doing it right. It is not an easy thing for any of us, so I just wanted to mention that to encourage you to continue to rest even when it feels uncomfortable. That is the journey that we are all on together.
All in all, planners really do a heck of a job reinforcing the things that we have not done. Which encourages us to continue to be exhausted, to continue to be burnt out, to continue to be stretched thin. None of those feelings or states are conducive to being productive, to get the things that we need to get done.
In order to be truly more productive in your life, it usually takes more than just writing down on a piece of paper. There is usually a ton of mindset work that needs to go into it. True change comes from going inwards and doing the internal work to heal ourselves. We need to be able to seek better lasting solutions without having to hustle, burn ourselves to the ground, and being stretched thin in every capacity.
If you got anything out of this post just remember to focus on the things that you have done and be able to reflect and celebrate those things. That is what is going to help you be more productive, that is going to help you feel more motivated and energized.
If you have any comments or questions, feel free to pop them below. I would love to talk with you more about how planners don't necessarily make us more productive and what you are going to do to make a change in your planning.
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The 3 best strategies to finally heal the multi tasker in you
The 3 best strategies to finally heal the multi tasker in you
As entrepreneurs, we end up getting stuck in a to-do list hamster wheel of busyness!
We end up feeling behind all the time on our own self-imposed deadlines and then, really struggle to balance our work and our lives so we end up trying to multitask.
If that is you, if you end up trying to multitask to get more things done in a day, this blog post is for you! I'm going to share three reasons why multitasking doesn't make you more productive and what to do instead so you can get more things done but in less time, less chaos, and less stress!
Our brains are not made to multitask!
What is the first reason why multitasking does not make you more productive? Our brains are not made to multitask, simple as that!
We are not made to do more than one thing at once. Our brains are designed to just accomplish one thing at a time. What we end up thinking is, multitasking is really just switching between things super fast or maybe even super slow. So putting all that pressure on your brain to do more than one thing at once is going against its nature.
It takes a lot more time to accomplish the few things that you're trying to accomplish at once and that is going to add so much stress onto your brain and onto yourself. A study on psychology today that showed how multi-taskers are 40% less productive and it can take as long as 25 minutes to resume working after an interruption or trying to switch to the other task. For example, if you end up checking Instagram while you are trying to write a blog post.
The best thing that we can do here is recognize, acknowledge and appreciate our human nature, our brains. This is where deep self-compassion comes into the picture.
What to do instead
When you find yourself trying to multitask because you feel behind or for whatever other reason, pause, remember that you, your brain just doesn’t work this way.
Then figure out what is the one task that you want to focus on, write it down on a piece of paper and have that front and center for you to remember.
This is a practice you're gonna keep coming back to. Just like if you've ever tried meditation and your brain starts thinking, you simply remember that you're thinking and come back to your breath.
Multitasking decreases your creativity
The next reason why multitasking does not make you more productive is that it kills your creativity.
When you're over there trying to switch between tasks, from task to task, your creativity is dampened, you probably have a lot harder time thinking outside of the box. Especially when you are trying to start your own business and be of service to other people, you're not going to be in that mindset or that frame of mind when you are just jumping from thing to thing.
And let's be honest, how many times have you had a brilliant idea when you're washing the dishes or in the shower? It's because, during those times, you are most likely just focusing on one thing.
The reason why that happens is that ideas are born from the prefrontal cortex, which is the forehead area, but this is the part of our brains that really truly can only focus on one thing at once.
So, as an entrepreneur, you know you need your most brainpower and your most creativity so it's not going to make you more productive by multitasking.
What to do instead
The solution here, or the way to move forward, is to define clear boundaries around your creative or deep thought focused time. Try to uphold them as best as possible, obviously knowing that this again, is a practice. You are never going to be perfect at upholding your boundaries and perfectionism is just not possible.
Multitasking takes you out of the present moment
The third reason why multitasking does not make you more productive is that you are not living or working in the present moment. When we race through life without truly experiencing all the small simple things about it, we are experiencing much less.
When we continue to try to multitask, eventually it does start to erode our focus and our ability to pay attention and stillness becomes completely impossible for us to even imagine integrating into our lives.
When you are present and add more mindfulness into your day-to-day, you are more able to focus and get more things done and do it without the stress and the chaos.
What to do instead
So the solution, or way forward here, is to practice mindfulness. Practice more breathing exercises in your day-to-day. Schedule them in your calendar or put them on your to-do list as things that you need to do.
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5 Telltale signs you are awesome at managing your time
Have you ever wondered if you spend your time in the best way possible?
In this post, I'm going to share with you five signs that prove you're awesome at managing your time and you're using it in the best way possible!
So hopefully you can take a deep breath, relax, and finally feel like enough, or have specific things that you can work on and maybe get some clarity on how to do that.
You get (mostly) everything done!
Sign number one that you are awesome at managing your time is that you get (mostly) everything done on your to-do list. This one may be an obvious one but let me explain, it's a really great sign that you manage your time when you get everything on your to-do list done but not at the expense of yourself and your life.
In order to get everything on your to-do list done and still enjoy your life, you put a realistic amount of tasks on your to-do list. Therefore, you get (mostly) all of them done. This means that you don't really struggle with procrastination or perfectionism.
And when you make a to-do list you are grounded in reality, so you know how long tasks take you. You aren't really into over-scheduling yourself, which is amazing, because so many people tend to over-schedule their life!
The flip side of that coin is, you tend to over-schedule yourself and you put a ton of stuff on your to-do list. You start working and things take way longer than you think they're going to take. You end up frustrated at the end of the week because you only got one or two things done from your massive to-do list.
I talk about this in another video but this means that you are most likely stuck in a to-do list shame cycle. So if you are stuck, start by putting less on your to-do list.
You can say no and delegate tasks
The second sign that you are managing your time awesomely is that you can say no and delegate tasks to other people. Saying no to the things that you don't want to do, or things that are not at the top of your priority list is huge! As goal-getters, or high-achieving people, it is hard to say no. Especially when you have tons of creativity, energy, and passion.
So, it means that you have a good grasp of what is important to you, your values, and the big picture of what you're trying to create in this world. It also means that you can set boundaries, which again, is huge.
The opposite, as you can probably imagine, is saying yes to all the things and having trouble delegating.
I totally get it, it's hard to say no, boundaries feel kind of mean and harsh. So, if this is you then just start with something super small. What can you delegate to someone else that you don't need to do? Or, what are you saying yes to that you don't really want to do? That's really all that needs to be done, just start prioritizing.
You can prioritize all your projects/goals
The third sign that you are awesome at managing your time is you prioritize the many, many projects that you are currently working on. Or, goals, dreams, and shifts that you want to make happen in your life. Speaking of the big picture, when you know your vision, your goals, and the things that you want to make happen in your life, you are able to prioritize what's most important to you and say no to the rest.
You are able to put a few projects on the front burner, and then everything else you're able to let go of until you have more time and space to do them because, I know you, I know you have tons of passion. I know you have tons of ideas, you are brilliant and you want so many things to come to life in your business and in your personal life.
So, it's really easy to work on all of those things at once. Don't get me wrong, I am a huge fan of being multi-passionate. I am as well, I think it's important to have many different projects that you're working on, to switch between and to refill your cup. But, when you have too many projects, goals, and things that you're working on at once, then you're overwhelmed, scattered, and stretched thin.
That's not really a great sign that you're managing your time but, if you are doing that, I just want to say it's okay. There are things that you can do, so if this is you the action step that I would suggest is writing out all of the projects that you are working on currently, all of the goals, all the habits, all the routines, all the things that you're trying to do, change and be in your life. Take a look at that list and just pick three. I say “just” like it's simple, it's not simple, I want to honor that it's not simple but, I know you can do it.
I know that you know, you can focus on three priorities max for a month, or even just start with a week. Start there.
You can take time off
So the fourth sign that you are amazing at managing your time is you can take time off, you have hobbies and creative outlets. It is always a great sign to me, when high achieving people and entrepreneurs have things that they can do on the side that doesn't have an end goal, doesn't have a return on investment, it's just something to get your energy up, to refill your cup, to find joy and just have fun.
I also want to add that they are non-negotiable. So it's not just things that you do every once while when you have time. It's things that are built into your routine, like self-care habits that are just non-negotiable, that they just happen.
It is so important to take time away from work and your projects. A great example of why this is also important for business is, the other day I had a client who had like the best idea ever while washing dishes. It is so important for your brain to just let go and have space.
The flip side of this is, you have a really hard time stepping away from work. You don't really have things that don't turn into side hustles or extra businesses or extra leg of the business. There's nothing wrong with that either but, when everything in your life has an end goal, end result, return on investment type mindset, then there's less play, there's less creativity, there's less enjoyment.
I bet that you value enjoyment and finding joy in your life so, the action step here is, just take a few minutes a day off of work. This can literally be anything, it could just be watching the clouds, it could be watching Netflix. I don't care what you do but, take some time off and maybe pick up a drawing class or a pottery class and just do something for fun. Have fun!
You value your human-ness!
The fifth sign that you are amazing at managing your time comes from an acronym that I just think is brilliant. It is called HALT and stands for “hungry, angry, lonely, tired”. This is probably the most important sign of them all, you are amazing at managing your time if you attend to your humanly needs.
So, when you're hungry, when you are lonely, when you are tired, when you are angry, when you have feelings about anything, you don't push yourself. You don't hustle, you don't grind, you take time off to honor those feelings, to refill your cup. Are you sensing a pattern to refill your cup?
You are able to use the bathroom when you need to go to the bathroom instead of continuing to work for two more hours! You go and eat lunch, breakfast, dinner, and all the meals and snacks. You call up a friend and hang out with a friend when you need some connection, anything that you feel like a human, you can attend to.
Speaking of being human, you are compassionate towards yourself. Like we talked about earlier, if you are stuck in a to-do list shame cycle, you don't beat yourself up, you are compassionate towards yourself. Even if you don't complete everything, you celebrate yourself, you tell yourself “good job” and you understand that you are human.
So the flip side of this is, if you feel like you are a robot, you beat yourself up for not being perfect 100% of the time. If you put your work and your to-do list over being human, that is a huge red flag in my opinion.
There is something that you can do about it, take time off, rest, take care of yourself. Maybe even schedule in time to just check in with yourself every single day and honor that. This sign is like I said, the most important and it's also one that just takes time to fully integrate.
Speaking of being human, just to reiterate, you could not be perfect at managing your time either. None of these things are black and white, they are moment to moment type things. You can get your to-do list done and be realistic one week and then the other week you want to do so much.
This is all an experiment, we're all throwing spaghetti at the wall together. So keep doing your best, keep celebrating you, keep celebrating your humanness, and comment below what makes you feel like you manage your time really well? I would love to hear it!