What if your pace isn’t the problem? A conversation on reclaiming capacity with Cindy Hoch

In this episode, I’m joined by Cindy Hoch—coach, facilitator, and holistic time practitioner—who shares what it means to rebuild your relationship with time from the inside out.

We talk about:

• how gentle curiosity changed the way she relates to herself and her clients

• what it means to honor realistic capacity

• the daily practice of softening the inner judgment and meeting yourself with grace

• how parenting, business, and time aren’t separate but part of the same ecosystem

• and why slowing down doesn’t mean doing less

Cindy’s journey through the Holistic Time Practitioner Certification wasn’t about learning how to “do more.” It wasn’t about tools or systems alone.

It was about unlearning urgency, making space for truth, and letting her body signal when enough is enough.

“I’m not necessarily doing different things. I’m doing them differently. I’m doing them with presence.”

She found a new way to guide her clients through time-related struggles rooted in softness and trust.

If you’re a coach, healer, or space holder who wants to help your clients navigate shame, burnout, and capacity with clarity, care, and integrity, this episode is for you.

Connect with Cindy

Cindy’s current offers in English:

1:1 sessions with Holistic Time Management, Theta Healing® & Trauma-informed Coaching: https://cindyhoch.com/en/theta-healing-en/

Check out her IG and website for new offers in English.

Cindy’s current offers in German:

1:1 sessions: https://cindyhoch.com/theta-healing/

Women’s Circles: https://cindyhoch.com/frauenkreis/

Connecting to the Soul of our Work: https://cindyhoch.com/soulconnection/

Ceremonial planning session in January 2025: check out her IG for updates

Want to support your clients in building a liberatory relationship with time?

The Holistic Time Practitioner Certification is a 12-week training for practitioners who are ready to stop replicating urgency—and start practicing a new way of holding space. You’ll learn frameworks, tools, and embodiment practices to support your clients in building time practices rooted in consent, care, and capacity.

Learn more about the Holistic Time Practitioner Certification and enroll in the 2025 cohort now. We start July 31st.

How do we help our clients follow through (especially if we struggle with it ourselves)?

If you support others through any kind of transformation, you’ve probably felt the ache when a client shares something you know all too well.

When your people get stuck, stalled, and avoid the thing they care about… you feel it in your body because you’ve been there too.

Follow-through is a common one.

As business owners, parents, space holders… we can deeply struggle with follow through, just like our people.

The good news? That means you understand and can help them.

Most of us are drawn to this work because we’re walking the path ourselves.

You don’t have to be perfect at it to support someone else. You just have to understand what follow-through actually requires. Especially in a world where people are stretched thin, punished for needing rest, or told they’re the problem when they struggle.

What follow through needs of us:

Dominant culture treats follow-through like a matter of discipline or willpower. Like if you just tried harder, focused more, pushed through, you’d “get it together.”

But that story erases and ignores the realities of being a human navigating life in a world shaped by capitalism, ableism, and supremacy.

What I’ve learned is that follow-through isn’t about forcing yourself to do the thing. It’s not about getting more done.

It’s about resourcing yourself and creating the conditions that make doing the thing feel more possible. Perhaps even easeful or joyful.

Here are the concepts that I teach to my clients around follow-through gently :

• Real desire and values alignment. Wanting to do the thing because it feels true, not because you think you should, or feel like you have to. Follow-through rooted in obligation rarely sustains. But when it's aligned with your values and chosen from your wise self, it's easier to return to, even when it gets hard.

• Right tools. Tools that are easy and actually help you, not what productivity culture says you should use. For me, that’s a simple Google Doc and a visual digital calendar that works with how my brain processes time.

• Right expectations. A realistic plan that honors your capacity and leaves room for being human. One that can flex, include rest, and allows you to pause or pivot without being punished.

• Right environment. We don’t follow through in a vacuum. We need environments and relationships that lower friction and make things easier. That might look like a quiet room, phone on Do Not Disturb, or a cozy blanket—but it also looks like access to childcare, a reliable ride, someone to co-work with, or a gym class that’s nearby and affordable.

• Right internal voice. An inner voice (or thought) that’s compassionate and curious, not critical. One that believes you can try again, that cheers you on, and gives you freedom instead of shame. This voice doesn’t say, You messed this up again. It says, You’re allowed to try again tomorrow.

• Right tolerance. The ability to be with discomfort (fear, doubt, frustration, boredom) without letting it take over or abandoning yourself. This is about building the inner capacity to stay with yourself when the work gets tender, messy, or uncertain.

• Right identity. How we see ourselves shapes what we believe we’re capable of. If you’re still living inside the story of “I’m a procrastinator,” it’s hard to show up differently. Part of this work is letting go of that egoic label and claiming something new.

If you’re someone who holds space for others…

You might wonder: What’s actually mine to hold when it comes to follow through?

As a space holder, this is what I believe:

• I’m not here to control outcomes.

• I’m not here to fix someone.

• I’m not here to take responsibility for someone else’s life.

I am here to help them tend to themselves.

• To name the conditions that support follow-through.

• To offer reflection without shame.

• To hold the possibility that change is always available.

• To offer accountability, if that’s what the client wants.

That’s my responsibility. The rest belongs to the client.

Helping your clients follow through deeply matters.

Helping someone follow through on what they care about interrupts shame and builds self-trust. It creates counter-evidence to the stories that say they can’t change.

It offers them a life that feels more like theirs.

That’s why it matters and why we do this work.

Want to better support yourself and your people in following through gently?

• Register for the free Follow Through Gently: Helping Clients Honor Their Commitments workshop on June 24th.

• Check out and enroll in this year’s Holistic Time Practitioner Certification program that starts on July 31st.

What’s really keeping my clients from taking action?

As space holders, it’s tempting to focus on tools and strategies to help clients take action.

But if we’re not careful, we start treating the lack of action like a problem to solve.

In our world, we’re taught to treat inaction like a mindset issue or a motivation gap.

But the truth is, most clients aren’t stuck because they’re lazy or uncommitted.

What if they aren’t actually procrastinating?

In this blog, I share why I don’t believe in procrastination, take you on a closer look at what might really be going on when clients struggle to follow through, and how we can support them with care instead of pathologizing.

Procrastination isn’t real. Not in the way we’ve been taught.

In my world, I don't believe in procrastination. At all.

The word procrastination might seem harmless, but it often does more harm than good.

• When we say “I’m procrastinating,” what we usually mean is: I’m bad. I’m lazy. I should be better than this. It becomes a shortcut to judgment and shame.

• It frames our deeper needs and feelings as irrational avoidance.

• It reinforces capitalist values of urgency and productivity. Labeling delay as “bad” assumes that faster = better, and doing = worth. It treats slowness or pause as failure.

• The more we identify with a label, the harder it is to imagine another way of being. 'I procrastinate' becomes 'I am a procrastinator,' and that reinforcing belief becomes a self-fulfilling cycle.

• It’s a label that flattens all the nuance of what’s really going on underneath.

Insight, change, and follow-through do not happen from this place.

That’s why I don’t even say the P word.

In most cases, what we call procrastination is actually a form of protection.

Some of the real (and completely valid) reasons our clients struggle to follow through

There is glorious untapped wisdom in everything we do, and everything we don’t do. Here are some of them:

• Nervous systems are overwhelmed. The world is burning, and they’re still expected to show up like everything’s fine.

• Carry shame around chronic illness, neurodivergence, or needing a different pace of care.

• Don’t know where to begin, or feel pulled in too many directions to focus.

• Caught in urgency culture, where everything feels like it should’ve happened yesterday.

• Already holding too much. There’s no space left for more stuff.

• Deep physical, mental, and/or spiritual exhaustion.

• Never learned how to work with their brain and body.

• Learned not to trust themselves, so every step comes with second-guessing.

• Afraid of failing, of succeeding, of being seen, of getting it wrong.

• Don’t have access to the resources they need: time, money, childcare, insurance, information, support, community, etc.

• Have lived through experiences that made them question their worth, their voice, or their right to take up space.

• Carry the trauma of living in an ableist, racist, neurotypical, cisnormative, capitalist society that prizes conformity and productivity.

None of those is procrastination. They’re needs and patterned responses to the conditions we live in. They deserve to be met with curiosity, not blame.

Most time management tools often reinforce the very shame and urgency we’re trying to relieve.

No planner or Pomodoro session can fix our nervous systems, the systems we live in, or our needs.

One, because we don’t need fixing. Two, because we need to help our people acknowledge what’s really going on underneath the surface with compassion and context.

This is where liberatory, relational, sustainable follow-through begins.

Where to go from insight?

Naming these patterns is powerful. Helping clients see the systems they’re up against and affirming that it’s not their fault is an important first step.

But if we stop there, we leave them in the burning house, aware but still overwhelmed.

Insight alone rarely changes patterns.

What actually helps is letting go of the surface task and resourcing that underlying need.

As a space holder, you can make follow through 10000x easier without any of the guilt, urgency, or shame.

That’s exactly what I’ll be teaching how to do at the Follow Through Gently: Helping Clients Honor Their Commitments Free workshop on June 24th.

Click here to register.

This is why we created the Holistic Time Practitioner Certification.

We train practitioners who know that time is political, personal, and sacred.

Inside the certification, you’ll learn how to help your clients honor their capacity, how to untangle time from shame, and follow-through from self-worth.

You’ll learn frameworks and tools, and more importantly, how to meet your clients in these tender places.

Plus the more you honor yourself and do this work, the easier it’ll be for you to teach your people how to do the same.

Learn more about the certification and enroll here. We start July 31st.

How do I keep going when I’m burnt out?

There’s nothing wrong with being burnt out.

I know that may sound silly, but hear me out.

Burnout doesn’t mean you did something wrong, like if you’d only planned better, worked smarter, or optimized harder, you wouldn’t be here. It doesn’t mean you’re broken, lazy, or not cut out for this work.

It usually means the opposite. That you’ve been giving your heart to something that matters. That you’ve been holding a lot. That you’ve been stretched by things you care about.

If you look to nature, Strawberries shrivel in the summer heat. It’s not failure. It’s part of nature’s cycle.

But still, when you’re deep in it and your brain feels like mush, it’s hard not to spiral and ask: Should I quit? Did I mess this up? Why can’t I just get it together? This blog is a balm to those questions and this moment in time.

Let burnout be morally neutral

In anti-hustle, liberation-minded spaces, there’s a subtle pressure to “do rest right.”

Capitalism has a way of sneaking shame into everything. Especially when we need a break, or rest.

But what if we stopped treating exhaustion as something to fix? Started treating it as something to simply listen to and respond to with care?

You’ve been working. Holding space. Navigating the collective grief and chaos of the world. Maybe running a business, caring for others, moving through personal transitions, showing up as best you can.

You’re full.

You don’t need a mindset hack. You probably need space to come undone a little. To regroup. To tend to what’s real.

Here’s what I do when I’m feeling burned out

Burnout thrives in tension: the clenched jaw, the constant alertness, the pushing through. It’s a result of gripping too tightly to expectations, control, and survival.

Softening is the opposite of that. It’s a physiological, emotional, and energetic invitation to release. It’s essential because it interrupts the very patterns that led you there.

1. Name where you are.

Recognizing I’m burned out is often the hardest (and most transformational) step because I’m in go, go, go mode. Acknowledging the oppressive systems and the polycrisis at play is key.

I say it out loud: “I’m burnt out. I’m tired. I’m at capacity. This is not a personal failure, but a symptom of living in a world that demands too much of us all.”

Letting myself stop pretending I’m fine softens something inside me.

2. Tend to your body.

Our bodies each need different things. But for me, it usually takes putting my phone down. Making a nourishing bowl of food. Stepping outside. Drinking a big glass of water. Taking my vitamin D supplement I’ve totally forgotten about. Hugging my partner.

Find the small things that reset your nervous system and remind your body it’s safe to soften.

3. Reconsider what’s actually urgent.

A lot of the urgency you’re feeling isn’t real. It’s internalized. It’s fear. It’s pressure from invisible timelines and fake expectations.

I usually ask myself, “What can wait?” Then I open my journal and write down everything I actually have to do (which is usually not much when I get honest with myself) and everything I’m letting go of for now. Typically, it’s social media, marketing, and creating.

4. Let yourself go.

Often doing the things above gives me enough clarity and energy to feel like I’m no longer burned out. But sometimes I am still burned out and need a longer and deeper softening. When I’ve tried to come back too early, this spike of energy is just that, a temporary spike.

However, other times, I really am just tired and need some care and a deep release.

Sometimes, despite what I need, I have to keep going in some way (bills and all). Navigating capitalism and a human body with needs isn’t simple by any means.

This is where the rubber meets the road. Sometimes you really have to let everything and yourself go under. For months, or years. The timeline in the void doesn’t have a deadline.

5. Let yourself be held.

Resting shouldn’t be a luxury, but it can feel like that. As someone who feels like they’re responsible for everything, an image that always stays with me is a massive hand holding me.

When burnout becomes morally neutral, reaching out for help stops feeling like failure too. Let your friends, clients, family, and community know. Let them hold you.

You don’t need to “be better” before you reach out. You don’t need to be perfect to ask for help. You can be tired and worthy at the same time.

Don’t forget, you’re still the person for this

Even when you’re not creating or launching or holding space for others, you’re still you.

Your mission is still worthy. Your vision is still alive. You are still a coach, a healer, a space holder. Even if you’re laying down right now.

What helps me let go is remembering the spark isn’t gone. It’s just dimmed. It’ll come back. You don’t have to force it. In fact, the quicker you acknowledge it and soften, the quicker the excitement usually comes back.

This is the long game.

We’re not here to hustle ourselves into the ground (and pretend we’re not). We’re here to create something sustainable. Something alive. Something that can breathe with us.

Burnout doesn’t mean it’s over. It means you’re at a turning point.

So take your time. Get honest. Rest. And when you’re ready, if you become ready, you can come back differently. With a slower rhythm. A clearer vision. More softness. More power.

Want support while you find your way back?

This is exactly what we do inside the Holistic Time Practitioner Certification.

We don’t treat burnout like a personal failure. We treat it like a signpost. A place to reorient. A doorway into remembering and building more sustainable rhythms inside your work and your life.

If you're a coach, healer, or space holder who’s navigating burnout and still deeply committed to helping others, you’re not alone.

Learn more about the certification and join us this July.

Not a facilitator but feeling burned out? Reach out for 1:1 coaching.

A gentle note: This post is not a substitute for medical or mental health care. If you’re experiencing severe burnout, chronic exhaustion, or thoughts of harming yourself, please reach out to a licensed healthcare provider or mental health professional. You deserve real support, and you don’t have to navigate this alone.

How do I structure my time as a space holder?

If you’re a coach, healer, facilitator, or space holder, you probably already know: it’s tricky to figure out how to best structure your time while honoring your needs and serving your clients.

Our culture teaches us that the more available we are, the more valuable we are.

But real service does not come from constant accessibility. It comes from tending to your own cycles, energy, and nervous system so you can show up fully, generously, and wisely.

In this post, I walk you through how I structure my time, how it’s evolved through different phases of my life, and some visionary ideas on how we, as space holders, can better think about structuring our time.

The unique time challenges of holding space

Holding space is not like other kinds of work. It’s not just about showing up, delivering a task, or completing a checklist.

It’s relational, emotional, energetic, and often invisible.

Your time is not just hours on a calendar. It’s tied to your energy, your care, your cycles, and your capacity.

Because of that, the unique challenges we face as space holders — emotional labor, invisible prep and recovery, nonlinear energetic cycles, and the constant balancing act between client needs and our own — greatly impact how we need to structure our time.

When we build our time structures with these realities in mind, we can eliminate copying time structures that were never designed for us, like rigid corporate schedules, and instead create a foundation that supports both our clients and ourselves.

How I’ve structured my time through the seasons

Over the years, I’ve moved through many phases.

When I was an engineer working a full-time job and teaching yoga on the side, I squeezed client work into small chunks between meetings, nights, and weekends. I was burning the candle at both ends, driven by passion to make it work.

When I left my 9 to 5 to work for myself, I had total freedom. I met with clients all throughout the day, whenever they wanted to. I drifted, floating between time zones as I traveled around the world. I discovered that too much flexibility leaves me unmoored, and intentional structure was not a cage but a kind of liberation.

Now, I’m running two businesses while farming in the summer and traveling in the winter. I have gentle containers to support each piece, and it helps me sustainably do everything I do.

But at all points in my journey, I didn’t want to work in or on my business for more than 30 hours a week.

What works for me

Structuring time doesn’t mean forcing yourself into a rigid schedule. It means creating intentional shapes and containers for how you want to move through your days, weeks, months, and seasons.

In each of these phases in my life, I’ve built structure by first asking myself soft, honest questions like:

• When do I want to be available for others? When do I need to hold space for myself?

• What are the natural rhythms of my energy, creativity, and focus right now? How can I work with them instead of against them?

• How will I make room for spaciousness for recovery, transitions, and the unexpected?

Then I adjust my client scheduling software and calendar to match my answers above. It’s really that simple, the trickiest part is being honest with yourself.

Once I acknowledged the bigger season and responsibilities at play in my life, it was extremely helpful to think in percentages.

These are the percentages I’ve worked from in order to have enough time for each area of my business, while still having a life:

• If you are newer in your practice: You might be spending about one-third of your working hours in client work, one-third in marketing and outreach, and the rest split between administration and business development. This is a time of experimentation, planting seeds, and inviting in new relationships.

• If you are more established and have a steady or heavy client load: You might be devoting the majority of your time to space holding, with smaller but still essential pockets for marketing, systems, and creative growth. This is a time of tending, harvesting, and sustaining what you’ve built.

These are simply gentle guidelines I’ve returned to when I felt lost or overwhelmed over the years.

I recommend asking yourself, “What percentage of your energy, attention, and care is needed right now in each part of your work?”

What becomes possible when you find the right structure for you

When you find the right structure for you, your energy, attention, and care are directed toward what matters most.

• You stop ending the day wondering where the time went.

• You feel okay leaving things for tomorrow, knowing you focused on what mattered today.

• You create space for the non-work things that nourish you… slow mornings, time in the garden, unhurried meals, creative play, walks without a destination.

• You realize that right-sized effort builds a business you can sustain for years, not just months.

• You become a living example for your clients, modeling what it looks like to work in a way that honors capacity, care, and liberation.

We can’t hold space well for others if we’re abandoning ourselves.

How you structure your time isn’t just about personal productivity and efficiency. It’s about breaking free from the linear, extractive models we’ve inherited and building liberatory ways of working.

This is cultural and relational work. It’s how we start building a world where care, rest, and sustainability are not afterthoughts, but the foundation.

Finding the right structure for you is totally possible.

Your clients are navigating these same challenges too. Want to explore this more deeply, for yourself and your clients? I invite you to check out the Holistic Time Practitioner Certification. We start July 31, 2025.