Feeling overwhelmed in life? Take a deep breath with this powerful story.
Have you seen that meme that’s like…
“I’m just trying to survive while working 8 hours a day, while being a parent, while starting a side hustle, while making sure my house stays somewhat clean, while also trying to take care of myself?”
Amy was living that day in and day out.
Joy? Forget about it.
If you’re living that right now too, I see you.
Take a deeeep breath.
Maybe another one.
And another.
While you may want to burn everything to the ground today, I’m here to remind you that something different is possible.
A overwhelm and stress-free (or at least a looooot less) might feel impossible today, and as a holistic time coach, I’m here to remind you it is possible.
Let Amy’s story give you hope that a life full of ease, peace, and balance can happen for you too.
Want the journey towards that life to be a lot easier (and quicker)? I invite you to work with me!
Tell us who you are and what you do.
My name is Amy Cissell. I’m a USA Today Bestselling Author of paranormal women’s fiction, paranormal romance, and contemporary fantasy. And I’m a day jobber.
What was your business and life like before you began working with me?
I was overwhelmed & felt guilty about being overwhelmed.
I had too many things to do, unrealistic goals, and a fear of saying no to more and more.
I was balancing parenting, a day job, an insane writing schedule, a side hustle, and taking care of house stuff.
I felt terrible and worked from 7 am - 10 or 11 pm almost every day, less dinner times.
I took almost zero time to take care of myself, and I didn't even know what was important.
What doubts did you have before working together?
I really didn't think anything would change. I didn't know HOW it could.
There was so much to do and unless this was magic "make more time/time turner" situation, there was no way to get through my to-do lists any faster or to cure the procrastination that I felt so guilty about.
I worried it would be a gigantic waste of money.
What surprised you about working with me?
It was so fun! And positive. I learned things about myself - something I didn't expect after 4.5 decades of living and a million therapists.
What has happened in your life or business since we worked together?
I have learned to say no.
I scaled back my side hustle (editing for indie authors) to my two favorite clients in 2022 and made sure that everyone knows I'm not available for more.
I planned my 2022 writing schedule with realism so I won't find myself stressed and overwhelmed about my goals.
I was able to take a leap to a new day job that will pay more and better benefits knowing that it's not forever and I can make everything work without feeling like I've done too much.
I've made more on royalties in 2021 than ever before, and my editing business is booked through 2022, so I know what my income stream will look like.
I have discovered what I enjoy about NOT working, and although it's sometimes still a struggle, I no longer feel (very) guilty when I take that time for myself.
I take every other Sunday completely off work, and every other Saturday off after 3 pm.
I take time in the mornings to enjoy my solitude before jumping into my schedule.
What would you say to someone considering hiring Becca?
It's literally life-changing.
I work less, have waaaaaaay less stress, and am getting at least as much done.
I've remembered what gives me joy and try to link everything I have to do with that.
I don't have to find joy in my day job, but I can find joy BECAUSE of it.
I have the money to do things I love to do and I know that there is no reason to always be on 100% all the time.
Ready to go from feeling exhausted and overwhelmed to having time for yourself, rest, and everything else your soul is craving?
Click here to schedule a no-pressure consult call with me now.
A practical guide to applying your human design type to your schedule
“Human beings have a right to be their own authority.” -Ra Uru Hu (founder of HD)
Hell yeah, they do!
Have you been trying to figure out how to get things done in a way that feels really good to you?
Without getting overwhelmed or super rigid in your approach?
Maybe you've been wondering how to fill your agenda with activities that make you feel like you're living your purpose on an energetic or soul level?
Yep, I hear these questions so often as a holistic time coach.
Let’s be real… traditional advice around time blocking and scheduling often makes us feel like failures in some way or another.
However, thanks to Ra Uru Hu, we do have the right to be our own authorities, especially when it comes to our precious time.
When you apply your human design to your schedule, it becomes so much easier to design your day to feel good to you and your soul. Continue reading to learn how!
This blog post is an expanded version of my Instagram Live conversation with Lexie Sparrow.
What is Human Design?
Human Design is a self-knowledge system. Similar to astrology, your chart is calculated based on when and where you were born.
However, Human Design combines Kabbalah, I'Ching, Myers-Briggs, astrology, biochemistry, genetics, and the chakra system all in one into this one big super-system.
Your chart tells you about your conscious and your subconscious gifts which are extremely helpful not only in your life but in business as well.
Conscious gifts are innate or things that you are generally aware of, for example, being a natural-born leader or speaking what other people are feeling.
Subconscious gifts are ones that we aren't necessarily aware of, but other people see in us.
Your chart can also tell you what some of your roadblocks are going to be. Because with your gifts also comes the opposite, which will be the challenges and the spaces where you can learn and grow.
What are the human design types?
The first place to start on your chart is called your energy type. Your type tells you when you're most productive, how you know when to do something, and signs that you’re on the right track. Which, as you know deeply impact how you spend your time.
Think of the Enneagram or Myers-Briggs self-assessments, if you’ve ever heard of them. For the Enneagram, you get a number. With Myers Briggs, you get a four combination. Human Design you get a type.
Your energy type is like the model of a car. But as we all know, there are different years that car was made, there are different colors, different interiors, or different add-ons. So this is like the very beginning of your design and a great place to start when diving into it.
There are five main types which I’ll go into each below: Generator, Manifesting Generator, Manifestor, Projector, and Reflector.
Generator
(AKA: The speeding train)
Yes, a train takes a while to get going, but once that train is going, it's going to take a lot for it to stop. This is what the generator energy is like.
You have a bunch of energy, most especially when you’re excited about something. But because it’s hard to stop doing something when your sights are set on something, it's important to wait until you know this is something I have to do.
Now it's not always possible to just work on things that we love to do. This is when delegating (or outsourcing) can come in and really support you.
How to apply your type when you’re designing your schedule:
Be sure it feels good to you. Create your calendar around the things that feel exciting, or a “hell yes” often as possible, and especially early each day and week.
Once you know when you’re most energized, it’s easy to create and stick to a rhythm making it easy to re-create into a reliable weekly agenda.
Refer back to your vision or goal in each time block description or task you add, especially for the things that you have to do but don’t love doing.
Include reminders to slow down, pause, or log off at the end of each day.
Group similar projects or goals together in your schedule so you can go deep and fast.
Take moments to look back at your schedule to look and celebrate all you’ve done.
Manifestor
Manifesterors are initiators, independent, quick starters, and change-makers. This energy is often described as a pushing energy. Manifestors are like, “I'm going here today, you can come with me if you feel like it and if you don't, then don't come with me, but I'm going.”
You are “supposed to” use your energy to inform people about what you’re actually going to do and allow others to follow along.
How to apply your type when you’re designing your schedule:
You need space to follow your energetic urges for what you want to work on and to be impulsive. But you also need some boundaries and systems in place, because otherwise nothing will ever get finished. Create a calendar that is essentially the bare minimum structure so you can accomplish the things that need to get done but still can react to things, change your mind, and flow.
Have a big to-do list somewhere, and then at the start of each day, add into your calendar the specific tasks that feel like a “hell yeah!”
If you’re finding you're just not finishing projects, reach out and hire a VA to keep you accountable or do all the small tasks you don’t want to do.
Your energy fluctuates so do not expect yourself to have an everyday morning and evening routine.
Wondering how to create a schedule made for you?
Digital Calendars For Humans will teach you how.
Manifesting Generator
MG’s have a ton of energy like a generator, but just as a manifestor does every day looks different. They are the original multi-passionate human. They can multitask and love to use their energy in many different ways.
How to apply your type when you’re designing your schedule:
Do not add anything that doesn’t excite you in some way in your schedule or back yourself into a corner by doing one thing a day (you probably won’t feel very accomplished at the end of that day).
Give yourself lots of options with some structure that generally feels aligned with your energy. I call this intuitive calendar management!
Put time caps on things, and maybe not to cap where you have to end it but like have a little check-in with yourself to make sure you’re still excited about it.
Have a big to-do list somewhere, and then at the start of each day, add into your calendar the specific tasks that feel like a “hell yeah!”
Remind yourself it’s okay to work on like five or six different things in a day, but keep track of where you started and finished on each project.
Projector
(AKA: The lighthouse)
Here we have a non-energy type. What does that mean? They don’t have much of their own energy and they derive energy from other people. They are generally called the non-workers. Efficiency (work smarter, not harder) is the name of their game.
However, you can quickly burn yourself out by kind of stealing other people's energy, so to speak. So rather look at output energy versus input energy. Output energy is things that are really going to drain you or steal your energy (ie, meetings, calls, or teaching). Input energy will give you energy back (ie, learning, studying, and being creative).
How to apply your type when you’re designing your schedule:
Batch output vs. input days or make sure that you’re balancing output activities with input activities every day and week.
Implement short work sprints and build in more rest breaks. For example, Wednesdays off instead of working the whole week and having to wait for the weekends.
Plan your weeks in a relaxed state, perhaps in your bed or on the couch with candles and music.
Sign up for regular co-working dates to leverage the energy of others.
Design your days in alignment with your natural gifts and talents. What are you really good at doing? How might you apply that to your time?
Struggle to follow traditional time blocking advice? Click here to read my top 5 secrets.
Reflector
We have another non-energy being. The rarest of the population, coming in at 1% of people. Reflectors don't have consistent energy. What often happens is they're picking up on other people's energy all the time which it can be really hard for them to figure out how they actually feel about what decisions they want to make.
If you’ve ever been around someone who’s excited and working hard, it’s easy for you to follow along (generally).
How to apply your type when you’re designing your schedule:
Include a lot more time to work on and sit with things so you can really figure out what's best for you in the big picture, not just in that moment.
Schedule things at least one month or two in the future so you have plenty of time and space to change your mind, make decisions, and tweak things.
Dedicate time to tune out the noise, go inwards, and come back to your truth. Regularly.
Creating a system of repeating tasks to automate things so you don’t have to think about them is amazing for you.
Apply unique-to-you boundaries to protect your energy within your agenda.
Grab your human design chart for free
Click here to go to the website I used to find my Human Design chart.
There are also a lot of amazing human design readers who will sit down with your chart and give you a customized reading which you can then integrate those findings into your calendar and time management.
However, beware! It can be easy to collect information and tools like Human Design without integrating and seeing the huge benefits in your life.
Integrate your Human Design Type.
Get the most out of your time.
Grab Digital Calendars For Humans now.
About the co-contributor:
Lexie Sparrow is a Holistic business strategist who helps coaches, healers, and wellness entrepreneurs build sustainable businesses online using tools like human design. Learn more about Lexie.
*Disclosure: I only recommend products I would use myself and all opinions expressed here are our own. This post may contain affiliate links that at no additional cost to you, I may earn a small commission. Read full privacy policy here.
Why time management books might not help you manage your time better
Why time management books don't help you manage your time better
It’s summer 2022. That means fewer work hours, more adventures, and a lot more reading for me. Personally, I have no goal in terms of the number of books I’ll read. However, I’ve read 16 books so far this year... and I have no plans to stop!
If you struggle with spending your time how you want to, focusing, getting things done, or procrastinating less, I'm guessing you're planning to read a time management book (or maybe, five) this summer.
Before you pick up any books, you need to know why most time management books don't actually help you manage your time better!
My hope is that this blog will either convince you to read romance fiction instead (😂) or help you make the most of any book you have or will read so you can truly start spending your time how you want to.
What’s wrong with time management books?!
I’m going to say this bluntly (with love). Almost every time management book claims it’ll help you...
accomplish more in less time
work less and take off more
find time for relaxation
take better care of yourself
feel less stress and anxiety
Yet the chance of that actually happening is slim to none. Why?
If they did deliver on their promises, 201,000 people a month wouldn’t be searching for time management help still.
Millions of people wouldn’t be working 50-60+ hours a week or unable to take off without feeling guilty.
Of course, another question is…Is it the advice that’s bad or is it the inability to integrate the advice given? I’ll get back to that in a sec.
For many reasons, the very concept of productivity books isn’t working.
The main reason is: You have to make time to read a book… that’s supposed to give you more time?
As you are merely trying to get everything done in your business and life, reading and integrating the tips in any book become yet another thing for you to do.
Blegh.
What if the time you spent reading about time management books, you spent listening to what you needed?
What do you want to do with your time? How might you make that happen? The strategies that you come up with are 10x more likely to work anyways.
This is what I support my clients with as a holistic time coach. Click here to read more about working with me.
Of course, sometimes we do need strategies from outside to experiment with, which is where time management books can help us. Here’s my best advice:
How to best use time management books
(In my “expert” opinion)
1. Take them with a big grain of salt
I used to read time management books that promised I'd become a productive magical unicorn if I followed their advice. I'd get all excited, thinking I'd finally figured out all my problems, try to implement the advice, and then discover it didn't work for me.
Or, it would work for a little bit… until they didn’t. So I’d move on to the next book while internalizing that something is wrong with me.
Does this cycle sound familiar at all?
The productivity industry has convinced us of three things: we need to be better or different, it will fix us, and if it doesn’t, something is wrong with us… not it.
When you approach any struggle in your life with any shame or guilt about who you are, progress is nearly impossible.
So before we go any further… I’d like to tell you that you are amazing. You don’t need to be fixed. Nothing is wrong with you.
Read the time management books that make you feel good about yourself, that align with your values, and laugh at the books or pieces of advice that don’t.
Don’t find any time management books that do that? Consider working with me!
2. Shift your expectations
Most of the folks I coach have really high expectations of themselves and feel like they should already know how to perfectly get things done and manage their time.
On top of that, time management books have an underlying assumption of: “You’ll be able to get everything done one day following my advice, and that’s when you can relax.”
Most productivity books and tips are imbued with toxic productivity and hustle culture. Read more about toxic productivity and how it impacts you here.
Your high expectations, societal pressure, and the underlying tone of toxic productivity only lead to overworking, more stress, and exhaustion. Yep, you read that right. Time management books often share advice that does the literal opposite of what they say they’ll help you get.
Time management isn’t easy.
Choosing what to do with your life and actually doing it is terrifying.
A book won’t make that decision for you.
When you read a time management book with a lot lower expectations, it will be much easier to throw out the things that don’t feel good to you.
3. Make them fit you, not the other way around
The people that write books about productivity, or create apps and programs, are sharing what works best for them.
Speaking of, did you know most productivity tips, apps, and strategies are made for software developers and engineers? Makes sense they don’t work for the majority of people!
That being said, you will most likely never find a time management book out there that has been made by someone in the exact same situation that you are in right here, right now. Unless you’ve written a time management book!
Yes, there will probably be some time management tips, strategies, books, and things out there with people similar to where you are but at the end of the day, there is no one exactly like you.
Which is a beautiful thing. However, it does make it a little bit more difficult to manage your time in a unique-to-you way.
What do you do? You get to create your own rules!
When you read a book, think of it as reading about someone else’s rules. Then ask yourself what rules of theirs make sense or feel good to you?
At the end of the day… the best time management strategy: How can you be more you?
4. Small changes, seriously.
I know so many people preach small changes and progress. But if you’re anything like me… we just want to get it all done as quickly as possible and keep moving.
Again, if you're already struggling with time, you don't have time to read books, and then implement all the information they throw at you.
When anyone attempts to change a ton of things about how they organize and spend their days and weeks, it will be extremely overwhelming and unhelpful. It will end in throwing everything out, and starting over.
It’s important to choose one to three small (I’m looking at you!) shifts that feel good and you’d want to make after reading any time management book.
Now that we’re here, to answer my previous question: “Is it the advice that’s bad or is it the inability to integrate the advice given?”
It’s both/and. Some advice really sucks, but other times, we try to change too much at once when we’re already stretched thin on time.
That said, the jury is still out for me whether time management books help people manage their time better. After reading this, what do you think? Will you read any time management books this summer? Let me know in the comments below.
Ready to feel more confident, in control, and at peace with your time? Click here to get holistic time management resources from me!
This one small change can make a big difference in your life
When you’re struggling to stay afloat, it’s extremely difficult to make changes.
However, in order to get out of that place, change is non-negotiable.
It’s the conundrum of the dog chasing its own tail.
How do you figure out what change will make the biggest difference?
How do you trust the change you’re making is the right one?
That’s what Jennifer and I’s work together really answered for her.
One of the biggest benefits of getting a coach is talking to someone else from a different place physically, mentally, and emotionally.
As Jennifer’s time coach, I offered a calming and pressure-free space for her to identify the tiny (almost invisible) shifts she needed to make great progress… and she did!
Read more about her journey below and how focusing on just how she used her time made a HUGE difference in her life.
Tell us who you are and what you do.
Hi! I’m Jennifer Garcia, Career Coach & Resume Writer. Best Resume Coach
What was your business and life like before time coaching with me?
I was struggling with staying afloat. I wasn't using my time in the business to move it forward only to barely sustain it.
I felt like I was constantly spinning my wheels and feeling burnt out and, honestly, hopeless.
I wanted to quit my business because I had no time for family or self-care.
You helped me change all that!
What did you love about working together?
I loved how our sessions were so calming! I honestly didn't expect that from a time management/productivity coach.
I expected it to be regimented and clear-cut. While you helped me have a clear vision, you never ever told me what to do or "should" do.
You gave me nudges in the right direction and encouraged me to learn and grow at my own pace. It was beautiful! Really.
I loved how I never felt pressured to get things done. I was already giving that kind of pressure to myself a lot. It was SO reassuring to come into a session with Becca, breathe together, and then trust that by making tiny (almost invisible) shifts I was going to make great progress. and I did! We did it together! That was so cool!
THANK YOU!!
I feel like the tools I have learned now can last me forever. You're so gifted as a coach and strong as a leader. I am so happy and thankful to work with you.
What has happened in your life or business since we worked together?
On month 1, week 1 I felt really skeptical (another thing I'm gonna fizzle out on). By month 2 I had some momentum. By month 3, I was pleasantly surprised to have reached my biggest goal!!
You helped me create more momentum and bring in more money in my business. It was really quite magical!
My business generated my monthly goal as a stay-at-home mom and part-time worker.
In my life, I have been calmer and let go of the anger and fears that held me back before.
I have time for rest, and better freaking sleep!! I am sleeping in now and not regretting it. I don’t feel behind or judgmental first thing when I wake up.
Better physical health, a better marital relationship, and better family relationships with my kids and with my siblings, parents, and friends.
I also have a better relationship with myself! I am now so much kinder to myself.
What do you think made those things (listed above) possible?
Trust and faith.
I had to believe in you and trust that you are capable and leading me on the right path to success. But ultimately, learning to trust myself and my own intuition. Being more open to (and ready for) having joy and fun in my life.
See yourself in Jennifer’s story and feel ready to see similar changes in your life? Click here to schedule a pressure-free consult call now.
The Truth About Time Pressure (Why You Always Feel Rushed)
The unsettling truth about time pressure (and why it's not your fault)
The meaning of time pressure
How often do you feel pressed for time or catch yourself rushing through the day?
Often? You’re not alone. According to Gallup Poll in 2015, 48% of Americans said they don't have enough time.
That right there is time pressure.
The Conversation defines time pressure as “…how rushed or pressed for time people feel on a daily basis”. It also relates to whether individuals perceive they have sufficient time to do what they need or want to do (including time for work, family, leisure, travel, study, volunteering or exercise).”
Time pressure can also be known as time scarcity, time poverty, or time anxiety.
The impacts of living with time scarcity
If you’re an entrepreneur or a self-development fan, I am sure that you have read about, taken courses, or done some healing work around a scarcity mindset when it comes to money.
Time poverty is no different.
According to the American Psychological Association, a scarcity of resources, including financial resources, shapes everyone’s decisions and behaviors. Living with scarcity drains mental resources and increases negative emotions, which narrows our focus and impacts our day-to-day decisions.
When you’re focused on a resource(s) being limited or running out, it takes you out of the present moment and prevents you from living the life you want to live.
Scarcity creates additional stress and anxiety, which we know now the massive impacts of stress on our bodies and minds.
Time pressure has a significant and negative impact on your ability to effectively manage your time, grow your business, and live your life.
I do also have to mention that some folks feel more motivated and work well under deadlines which is an acute form of time pressure. However, when you have a chronic feeling that there are simply too few hours in the day, that’s when the negative impacts start to set in.
Why time anxiety is not your fault
I do an exercise with my holistic time coaching clients to get a gauge on any time pressure or anxiety they have.
Often, they're shocked about how many negative thoughts they have around time that adds to felt time pressure.
Some common thoughts are:
“I'm always late”
“I'm so behind”
“I can’t believe it’s already (insert month/year)”
“I'm way too slow”
“I'm so busy”
“I don't have the time”
“I never have enough time”
“I don't have time to relax” or “I'll relax when I'm done”
“I'm not productive”
“I waste so much time”
(Notice any over-generalizations or all-or-nothing thinking?)
Once my clients start noticing their time scarcity mindset in their lives and business, it’s a lot easier to make decisions and create sustainable time management strategies to mitigate other time pressures.
The three biggest questions that I asked myself when I started healing my time scarcity mindset were:
What did I see and learn from my parents, caregivers, and those around me as a kid, growing up around time?
What do I currently think and feel about time?
Why do I believe them? Why do I think they're true?
Personally, I realized that I had adopted a scarcity worldview from my childhood, education system, and previous wage-labor jobs. My clients are frequently in the same situation.
Time anxiety is not limited to just your or my personal experiences though. We also need to investigate who or what taught so many people that what we get done is insufficient or that there is never enough time.
Time poverty is a societal (and systemic) issue
Mindset work can feel gaslight-ey.
Thoughts are hard to catch. Especially when you don’t or you feel like you don’t have enough time.
Not enough time is 100% real, nor are all 24 hours the same for everyone.
I appreciate that the APA states that any negative actions connected to scarcity are not the fault of individuals experiencing a form of poverty; scarcity research indicates that these are universal processes.
I mean…if in 2015, 154 million Americans said they felt time scarcity, it makes sense to me that it's a systemic issue just as any other large-scale issue is.
This is where I always come back to the negative impacts of capitalism.
Redflag shares, “The competitive drive to accumulate wealth through the exploitation of human labour is the starting point for understanding capitalism and oppression.”
Human lives (aka our time!) are the most important resource to profit on the planet.
There will never be enough time to get everything done. It’s literally impossible.
This is why the traditional time management and productivity advice encouraging us to get more work done, faster leaves us exhausted and confused.
Time abundance and liberation are possible
Feeling a lack of time is one of the things that is easy to revert back to. It’s normalized and engrained to think, say, and communicate to the people in our lives about how busy we are and how little time we feel we have.
I want to make sure I share with you that there is hope.
Time abundance (feeling like you have more than enough time) and time liberation (feeling free around how you spend it) are possible for you. I believe they are possible for everyone.
Both require individual AND systemic shifts, that are equally important.
Individually, if you want more time, or at least to feel like you have more time, in your life TODAY, I suggest starting with your thoughts rather than anywhere else.
Why?
Because if you have a time scarcity mindset, you will never have enough time no matter what planner, calendar, hack, or tool you try.
Addressing your time beliefs can make a huge difference in your relationship with time and really support you in managing your time more aligned with your values.
What’s coming up for you after reading the unsettling truth about time scarcity? Feel free to comment below. I’d love to support your investigation, healing, and thriving.
Learn more about how to feel at peace with time (while still accomplishing deeply meaningful goals)!
How to achieve your goals and feel well-rested (yes, it's possible!)
It feels extremely counter-productive to focus on rest and health FIRST, then our to-do lists.
We’ve been taught to get everything done, and then we can take a break.
What happens when it’s literally impossible to get everything done? Cause that’s the truth. You will never get everything done.
We stay exhausted, running on a treadmill of tasks hoping for one day when we can breathe.
That’s where traditional time management extremely suffers, and holistic time management excels.
When you put yourself first, like legit first, and everything else after… achieving your goals and feeling well-rested becomes a reality.
Finally!
Find out how Kirsten was able to put herself first while accomplishing even more than she set out to in our 3-months working together.
Since this post is more of a case study than a how-to, don’t miss the coaching questions at the end of this post to apply Kirsten’s wisdom and transformation to your life and business.
Tell us who you are and what you do.
Kirsten Welge, Founder/Director of Natural Awareness, LLC
What was achieving your personal and professional goals like before you began working with me?
After leaving my corporate healthcare manager position of 5 years for a 6 month 'sabbatical', I was struggling to set a daily routine that helped me complete deeply important goals AND left me feeling well-rested.
I relied on deadlines and a buildup of external and internal pressure to move me - which didn't translate well to cleaning the home or completing other "maintenance behaviors" necessary for life to run smoothly.
What did you love about having me as your holistic time coach?
Your check-ins strongly supported accountability.
Mindful breathing to start our sessions.
Experiencing your presence – you're gentle and accepting, which helped me to soften my approach to myself.
The invitations to try things out and see how they worked for me (like bedtime rituals).
Your approach to time management and the calendar make-over!!! <3 That was life-changing.
What has happened in your life or business since we worked together?
In my life…
I realized my body does cue me when it's tired -- and I am practicing setting a rhythm to settle towards a regular sleep time of 9-9:30 PM. (A far cry from working until 3 AM!!)
I began to listen more to my body, and nap when it asks me for rest. I feel more refreshed and relaxed.
I accepted that I am not a robot that can produce indefinitely at the same rate, regardless of feelings or circumstances.
I donated a trunk full of bags of items to Goodwill, and donated another 40 pieces of business clothes (suits, pants, jackets, shells, blouses) to a local group that sets up low-income women with interview & business clothing.
I cleared the main floor space of our home - AND KEPT IT CLEAN with maintenance of 5-10 min every evening. WOW! ...and this led to a huge breakthrough and more trust with my partner. Thank you!
I cleared a space in the basement for my "recording studio" for a national talk.
I prepared and delivered a national talk to my aikido federation on why I train, and how our training can be applied in daily life.
I completed a series of biweekly bike rides (including time trials, hill climbs, and gravel rides I'd never done before) on 10-40k+ routes from June-August.
I developed muscles and speed I have never had before.
I completed a 10-day solo Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness trip, with portaging (never done before), and found greater clarity and trust in my mind-body than ever before. I had no regrets whatsoever about spending that time alone.
In my business…
I opened up to being OK with not producing an income with every action I took.
I worked through anxiety about comparing myself to how others did things.
I worked through anxiety & resistance about offering certain classes, made clear, confident decisions, and experienced greater ease and alignment.
For Q4, I reduced my number of quarterly goals to THREE, from more than 8... and am seeing progress on those three fronts, instead of feeling like a hamster trying to spin multiple wheels. Awesome!!
Thanks to your calendar makeover, I now have large time blocks for focusing on a particular group of tasks. This is SO helpful!
And, I've built in time for daily activities to settle me and connect me to my partner and friends, which often fell to the wayside in the past.
I filed for my LLC!!!
And, I finally put together a site for my business and flier for my first program, Track Your Backyard! I have learned so much and now have a functioning website. AWESOME.
What do you think made those things (listed above) possible in just 3 months of working together?
Focusing on rest and health first.
When I'm rested, I have a greater awareness of myself and what's needed, short- and long-term - and I am more efficient and effective at completing what's needed.
Boom. ^That’s the key right there.
But how?! How do we make this massive shift in how we manage and think about time?
Here are some coaching questions for you to think through:
How might you put yourself first, and everything else second (or later)?
What might be keeping you from being able to do that?
What is your next best step forward?
Want to achieve all your deeply meaningful goals without feeling exhausted and overwhelmed?
Let’s make it happen! Click here to schedule a no-pressure consult call now.
10 Powerful mindset shifts to revolutionize how you spend your time and money
“How do I take more time off without impacting my revenue and income?“
If you’ve ever asked yourself that question, you’re in the right place.
Dave, from Turning Point Financial Life Planning, joins me for an in-depth interview about the real and deep connection between time and money.
You will walk away with:
Tangible language around the relationship between the two and why our resources always seem to be in opposition.
Clarity on what you can and can’t control when it comes to your time and money.
How holistic financial planning and time management is the key to finding your unique balance.
Tools we use to create time and money abundance in our lives and businesses.
How do you see the connection between time and money?
Dave
There is of course a relationship between time and money. We use time to earn money. We use money to buy ourselves time.
But what’s most striking to me about both time and money - is how many of us have a relationship with both time and money which is defined by scarcity.
There’s never enough time. There’s never enough money.
But what’s interesting is that while our immediate time and money resources often feel exceptionally constrained, we often assume that time and money resources will be more abundant in the future.
These beliefs might sound something like: I can’t save for retirement right now, but I’m sure it’ll all work out. I don’t have time to rest and recuperate right now, but as soon as I [insert goal here] I’ll be able to.
The trick is, of course, that all we ever have is the present moment.
How you are — and how you think — in the present moment is quite likely how you will be and how you’ll think in future present moments.
So what to do? We train ourselves to think, and relate, differently to money and time.
I believe this retraining begins with a deep reflection on who you are and what you want. What is important to you? How do you want to be leading your life?
Answering these questions is hard work. And it isn’t easy.
Aligning your use of time and money with a deeply meaningful and fulfilling experience of living is not a quick fix. It is a life-long practice.
But it’s incredibly rewarding and worthwhile.
Becca
Time and money are tools that societies have developed with the intention to help us live more collaboratively. The main difference between them though is money is completely invented by humans, while time is inherently natural–the sun rising and setting every day, standardized and commoditized.
Just like any other tool, both time and money can be used in a healthy and beneficial way on a collective and individual level, or in a corrupt and scarce way.
When an individual has enough time and money, most people would say they have a good quality of life. Almost everyone I work with as a time coach, as well as myself personally, is aiming for this sweet spot. Also, when an organization uses its time and money in a healthy way, they are able to make a positive difference in the lives they impact and one would most likely say that is the definition of success.
How often is this sufficient sweet spot achieved (or even noticed), individually or collectively? Rarely, unfortunately.
Why? I believe this for two main reasons.
The complex relationship that exists between us and the two.
Time and money are deeply intertwined: How we spend our time, impacts the amount of money we have. Likewise, how we spend our money, impacts the amount of time we have. Often the more we have, the more we’re able to create.
How each of us experience, use, and feel about both time and money are impacted by who we are as humans, our experiences, and our outlook on the world.Corruption and scarcity.
There’s a lot that can be said about why, how, and where. But if I had to summarize it: Our economic system, as we know it, is completely dependent on how much of our time (human life) can be bought as cheaply as possible to turn into a profit. This has created a society that is individualistic, and competitive and highlights a scarce relationship when it comes to our time and money.
Over the years, we’ve been taught to equate our influence and worth as humans with how much money or time we have. When one doesn’t have or doesn’t feel like they have, enough money, time, or both, there is often a felt sense of failure.
What can I control when it comes to time/money?
Dave
I have good news and bad news.
The BAD news is that you can control virtually nothing when it comes to time, money (or anything else in life).
The GOOD news is that you can control virtually nothing when it comes to time, money (or anything else in life).
Much as we might try and resist this inconvenient fact, we have the ability to control only two things: our attention and our actions.
That’s it. Your attention and your actions. That’s all you’ve got. What are you paying attention to right now? You can control where you direct that attention. What action are you taking right now? You can control that action.
But there’s a catch! (Isn’t there always a catch?) You can only control your attention and actions IN THE PRESENT MOMENT.
Literally, everything other than your current-moment actions and attention is outside of your control.
But this is actually good news - it can be a relief to recognize we can only do what we can do - and we can let go of trying to control the rest.
There is SO MUCH in your financial life that’s out of your control. Pretty much everything! That’s ok. You can let that go.
And then… let’s focus on where you can direct your attention… and what intentional actions you can perform to begin your journey to financial health and wholeness.
Becca
There’s a lot out there we don’t have control over in our world. However, because money and time are human constructs, I believe we have control of quite a bit.
We have control over:
What we do with the time and money we have. We get to vote with our minutes and dollars for the kind of world we want to see.
How we think and feel about time and money.
How much is enough in our lives.
I also know the overwhelm or apathy that can set in when thinking about how big and messy the world is can melt away when we focus on what we do have control over. How might you focus on what you have control over?
What is holistic financial planning?
Holistic financial planning takes care of you as a whole human being. It doesn’t impose unrealistic budgets (or any other unrealistic constraints) upon you, because it incorporates your humanity.
The whole point of financial planning is to build a better life for you as you actually are - not as you (or anyone else) thinks you should be.
Holistic financial planning begins with you and your life. What do you want your experience of living to be like? What do you want to spend your time doing? How much do you want to work? Beyond work, what else do you need time, money and energy for?
Holistic financial planning includes working to let go of productivity as self-worth (thank you, Brené Brown). We then intentionally structure meaningful and financially rewarding work as one part of your overall life plan.
Once we’ve thoughtfully defined the life you want, we get about the work of structuring your financial resources to support that great life. That is actually the easy part!
Sure, there are things to learn and work to do, but the hardest work is getting clear about your vision for your life. Don’t worry - I’ve got some tools to help you bring some clarity and definition to your great life. If you’d like, you can get a sneak preview here.
What is holistic time management?
There are millions of blog posts, articles, podcast episodes, and books out there giving advice on time management and productivity. However, even with all the advice out there, how many people truly feel like they have enough time and are able to spend their time how they want to?
Millions of people. Why?
Regular ol’ time management has one main goal: Be more productive and efficient at work. With the general undertone or implication to make more money, oftentimes for your company or boss. Traditional time management and productivity gurus say to be more productive at work and get everything done first to earn, self-care, rest, or time-off.
But we know that to-do lists never end and believing we can work really hard to get ahead only leads to stress, overwhelm, burnout, and often less money or success. That’s where holistic time management comes in.
Holistic time management’s one main goal is: Spend your time in a way that makes you healthy and fulfilled today.
The assumption in traditional time management is flipped on its head and says you can get everything done easier and achieve everything you want when you prioritize your well-being first. Because when you’re well-rested, healthy, happy, energized, and taken care of…time becomes abundant.
If you had to pick one tool to share, which do you think is most impactful?
Dave
Engaging with your money stuff and structuring your financial life - whether you hire someone like me to help you build a holistic financial plan - is NOT a one-and-done project. Rather, navigating our money is an ongoing practice.
For that reason, I believe that cultivating a consistent practice of engaging with your money and your finances is the single most powerful tool out there. Especially as a small business owner, you have myriad financial tasks to execute and money matters to contemplate.
For (almost) everyone I suggest the practice of a weekly “money date.” The money date isn’t an original idea, but I sorta have my own take on it. You can hear me speak in greater detail about the money date here.
The core of a money date is a weekly, scheduled time for you to sit with your money stuff — and see what comes up.
This isn’t a time to actually accomplish anything. Rather, it’s a time to simply be present, to bring your awareness to some financial matter. And be curious about what you discover. Curious about the external details. And curious about what internal, emotional responses and bodily sensations arise within you.
We engage to make better friends with our emotional responses, especially those which are a bit more challenging to hold (like fear, anxiety, or worry). By holding this space for exploration, your next, empowering money steps will begin to reveal themselves.
Becca
You!
There is so much pressure, information, and noise out there telling us how to best organize and spend our time. There are a ton of tools… and I believe they all can work.
The real tool is who you are, your core values, and what makes you tick. You don’t have to go searching outside of yourself. Pause, tune out the noise, ask yourself how you want to spend your time… and then do that.
Sounds simple, but oftentimes the most simple thing is the most powerful.
As a holistic time coach I get to help people leverage who they are in order to live more consciously, fully, and joyfully in their relationship with time. The work I do with my clients is profound because it all starts with getting to know who they are in relation to their time. It’s a time management tool, skill, and hack all wrapped up into one.
What’s a time and money quote you live by?
Dave
This quote has nothing to do with time or money. And it has everything to do with time and money.
When we’re thinking that we’re competent or that we’re hopeless—what are we basing it on? On this fleeting moment? On yesterday’s success or failure? We cling to a fixed idea of who we are and it cripples us. Nothing and no one is fixed.
That’s from Pema Chödrön’s book The Places That Scare You. And I’ve found money is often a place that scares us!
Becca
I have two I have to share here:
Scarcity is a lie. Independent of any actual amount of resources, it is an unexamined and false system of assumptions, opinions, and beliefs from which we view the world as a place where we are in constant danger of having our needs unmet.” - Lynne Twist from The Soul of Money.
I grew up in a false scarcity of time and money, but it felt just as real. I’m continuously working on healing my scarcity relationship and this quote helps me do that. It’s firm, convincing, and direct… all of which I need to make my overthinking mind take a pause and say “oh, yeah… that’s true.”
As long as you’re oriented toward the future, you can never just relax into what you already have or already are.” -Pema Chodron
Apparently, Pema Chodron has deeply impacted our relationship with time and money, Dave! Love it. As a buddhist, Pema reminds me that life is short, uncertain, and scary as hell. That’s why I live by this quote. It’s the solution required to heal scarcity and fear.
What mindset shifts will you integrate in your life and business from this interview? Comment below.
Want to feel confident, in control, and at peace with your time? Click here to get free + supportive resources!
Swamped by too much work? An inside look at how I can help you
Spend your "downtime" on weekends feeling guilty because you have too much work on your plate?
Not sure what the heck to do about your never-ending to-do list either?
I hear you, and I got you.
Most people think they have to change everything they’re doing, use rigid time management techniques, and be someone other than who they are.
Well, you don’t.
In fact, the more authentic and flexible you are, the easier it’ll be to kiss too much work and time-guilt goodbye and start actually getting ahead.
Hear from Maria Prendeville below to learn more about how working with me helped her…
Be more present with my family and friends.
Take time off feeling guilt-free.
No more working weekends or feeling bad for not working (even if it's been a busy week).
Hobbies be a lot more enjoyable.
Feel far more in tune with her gut and intuition.
Tell us who you are and what you do.
I’m Maria Prendeville and I’m a Content Writer for B2B companies.
Before you began working with me, what was your life like? Did you have too much work on your plate?
Yes! I felt burned out and like I couldn't stay on top of my never-ending to-do list. Every day I piled way too much on my plate, and often felt so overwhelmed that I couldn't even tackle anything.
Every week would end with me wishing I had 10 more days of the week to get stuff done!
Then, I would spend the "downtime" on weekends feeling guilty because I thought I should be working to catch up on stuff. So work was like a never-ending "unproductive", tiring guilt trip.
What doubts did you have before working together?
I was apprehensive about the process I would have to follow.
Although I had an idea that Becca worked closely with calendars and not with following stringent, whacky time management processes…there was a part of me that thought I'd have to completely overhaul my lifestyle and work methods and then that wouldn't last, because I knew no other way!
What has happened in your life or business since we worked together?
I have become far more relaxed about work and the stifling guilt that I felt almost every day about not working more is almost completely gone now!
I see now that work was probably the main problem/stressful area for me, but I've noticed that since I've started managing this better that the positive effects can be seen across my life.
I'm more present with my family and friends.
When I take time off it's guilt-free, it's a hard rule now that I don't work weekends.
I no longer feel bad for not working (even if it's been a busy week).
When I switch off I switch off completely.
My hobbies are a lot more enjoyable.
I'm far more in tune with my gut and intuition.
It has also put into perspective the kinds of industries and companies I want to work for; giving myself the space to find what I truly enjoy and the type of writing and reading I like means I intentionally choose who I work with.
I've also become a lot more flexible with my work. Before I thought I had to be super regimented and if I wasn't then the day was "ruined." Now I see with the help of my calendar how my time can be cleared and rescheduled according to random life events that inevitably pop up.
What do you think made those things (listed above) possible?
Having more compassion for myself and realizing that I truly am human with faults.
Becca's help with digging through why I feel the way I do and uncovering my rooted thoughts around certain beliefs I held definitely highlighted the unnecessary belief systems I followed. This questioning opened up a new way of thinking for me and she held the space for me to be able to think for myself about why I follow certain work rules or think I need to be this productive.
And of course, Becca showing me that my calendar is completely within my control and that there is space to do all the things in an effective manner while completing them stress-free!
What would you say to someone considering hiring Becca?
Your life is going to change! Haha but seriously, I would tell them it's money very well spent.
These are positive habits that will not only help with work but across all areas of your life. Instead of thinking about this coaching as something else you need to work on in your life and adding an extra stress, if anything this coaching allows you to focus on what is truly important and it helps to take AWAY those unnecessary to-do lists and stressors.
Get ready to be far more aligned with a life you love living.
Feel burned out because you have too much work on your plate?
Together we can turn your overwhelm and stress into confidence and peace. Learn more about my services here.
How quarterly planning helps you stay flexible and accomplish your goals easier
How many times have you created a plan only to have life come up and derail it all?
This is one of the most common things I hear from my clients, students, my partner, and basically, everyone who’s ever planned anything.
In this blog, I’m going to share with you why quarterly planning was the key to creating a plan that allowed me to stay focused and accomplish my goals, while also being flexible and responsive to life’s uncertainties.
Ready to set you and your business up for success this upcoming quarter? Check out my Holistic Quarterly Planner (available for puchase).
Quarterly planning accounts for life’s uncertainties
We know just how uncertain and unpredictable life is now more than ever.
When unpredictable events happen, things shift inside and outside of us. We change, external circumstances change and our goals change… causing our plans to change.
I don’t know about you but when I make plans and they change, I feel like I wasted so much of my time. I’m also reminded of how little control I don’t have over things making a part of me never want to plan again.
This is where quarterly planning is so effective.
Instead of spending tons of time at the beginning of a year planning the entire year out, quarterly planning just asks you to think about and plan 3-months at a time.
When you break your year down into four pieces, it’s easier to prioritize projects allowing you to stay focused and accomplish your goals easier. When you quarterly plan with me, you also get to pause, reassess how you’re spending your time, and realign your plans to who you are as a person.
The result?
Saving hours of planning time, doing time, and wasting time following an outdated plan (or no plan at all).
Say goodbye to under (or over) estimating your capacity
Oh, human tendencies.
Did you know that when people set annual goals (think new year's resolutions) we underestimate how much we can actually achieve?
As I mentioned above, none of us know who we’ll be or where we're going in 12 months from now. That’s why lots of new years resolution-ers set one main goal: they just want to grow their business by 25% this next year. Or start running. Or eat healthier.
I bet you also didn’t know (but really did know) is humans have a tendency to overestimate how much we can get done in a day or a week.
We put so much stuff on our daily & weekly to-do lists, rarely getting to half of it.
Yep, you guessed it. Quarterly planning takes into account under (and over) estimating tendencies by focusing on 3 months.
When we’re realistic with how much we can actually do, our plans, and the goals we set will make it so much easier to accomplish what we want to do.
So many priorities, not enough time? Don’t worry, quarterly planning to the rescue!
You have all the things that come along with growing & managing a business.
Maybe you still have a 9-to-5 or another gig to supplement your income.
You want to take really good care of yourself: regularly meditate, meal prep, work out, and learn how to knit, paint, or play the guitar.
You want to save money or travel the world.
You want to spend more time with your family and your friends.
The list of recognizing your potential doesn't end there.
Guess what? I think it’s such a beautiful thing to want to be your best self but, it can also lead to lots of overwhelm, frustration, and inaction.
Quarterly planning helps you figure out what to focus on NOW that will get you the best, most fulfilling results. When you plan your quarter with me, you’ll go inwards, identify what season you’re in, and how to do it all without feeling like you’re doing it all.
Click here to read more about how to prioritize effectively when life feels overwhelming.
I’ve been hosting quarterly planning workshops for almost three years.
If you want to have…
Clarity on what you really want to focus your precious time & energy on for the next 3 months.
A step-by-step plan created by your internal guidance that make it so much easier for you to follow your plan and accomplish your goals (Finally!!!)
Fresh intentional energy and motivation to help you really make the most of your time.