Case Study: How to achieve work-life balance that is real & sustainable
I hear time and time again that work-life balance isn’t real or possible to achieve.
And I totally get that. As a multi-passionate/dimensional human…having time for everything that’s important to us isn’t easy in the society we live in.
While I won’t get into society’s failings here, I will say that there are many things we can do as individuals to make the juggling act easier for ourselves.
In this blog post, one of my clients Talon will delve into what helped them achieve work-life balance. Hint: It’s not another hack.
Rather than temporary solutions, we explored the ratio of work, rest and play that makes them the happiest, what types of play and rest are the best, the type of work and social environments that enable them to thrive and give more, and so much more.
Together, we uncovered how to best spend their time to be well and accomplish everything they need and want as a full-time and part-time jobber, creative, partner, and cat parent.
We made work-life balance real, and sustainable.
Tell us who you are and what you do.
Talon Tuong. Property manager & accountant, fantasy writer, mixed media artist, tarot reader, and cat parent
What was your life like before time coaching with me?
I reached out to Becca at the end of October. I had hit another burnout moment because I had overfilled my calendar yet again, and one more stressor was the hay that broke this camel's back.
I was overwhelmed with too many great opportunities and friends, and feeling guilty about declining any of them. Because I should be grateful for all I have, right?
I wanted to maintain good friendships. I wanted time to grow as an artist, take care of my house and cats, go on dates, and rejuvenate in solitude.
I work full-time plus part-time. I had no idea how to do it all or how to say No. I was starting to resent friends and invitations especially living in Los Angeles where things are happening all the time.
I felt like I was reacting to everything, and things stopped feeling fun. I started trying to say No, and I felt grief over being too tired to pursue certain opportunities, and while some friends were supportive, others felt threatened that I would spend less time with them.
I knew I couldn't handle it alone, so I started looking for time management coaches because I was feeling mad and conflicted about my calendar. I felt stuffy and agitated all the time.
What did you love about working together?
I discovered my guiding values, and I was surprised to find that they applied to literally everything in my life.
I opened up to Becca about every new challenge that came up in my life, I'd do the prompts she gave me, and as she'd listen to me process my experiences, she mirrored how all my hopes and fears led back to the same core values. Even when I thought it was a new situation, new problem, new people, new area of life. It all came back to Authenticity, Ease and Sharing My Joy.
I want to stay true to my values, always. And I want things to stay easeful. I want to rest. I want to work from a place of excitement and strength. I don't want to struggle and strain. I want to share what's true to me and find those who resonate with it, and nothing less.
Becca's ability to synthesize and cut to the heart of all my rambling thoughts is her superpower! When I would get into overthinking, she helped me come home to things I already said! And through experiencing the powerful way she listened to me and mirrored me, I learned to enjoy listening to myself and others more deeply than ever.
What has happened in your life or business since we worked together?
The stars aligned because I went through it all with Becca! I had holidays, got sick, needed to help my parents, fought with friends, job creep happened. Everything that could uproot all my perfect calendar plans happened. I was especially fixated on my relationships, whether to be on social media, and my creative calling.
By the time we were done, I had strengthened my boundaries and emotional regulation toolkit for when stress hit any random day or week. I no longer feel derailed when chaos happens. I just deepen into self-care first.
I was able to shift my intention for creativity so that I express myself as an extension of whatever self-care I need that week, instead of trying to push myself to come up with things to create on top of what I'm already doing.
I improved my relationships by creating more time for myself to rest and center so that I could fully show up as my best self for people.
At first, I feared that in order to make more time for creativity, I needed more solitary time than people time and that it would be a huge shift for the people in my life. I'm a people pleaser! Horrifying! But it turns out I needed more rest. I didn't have to choose between social and solo opportunities. By choosing rest, I was able to show up more fully for both.
I finished more paintings, wrote more, joined a book club, and I did all of it from a place of easygoing joy instead of panicked juggling.
Artist block and social resentment went away because I made more space to do nothing and feel zero pressure.
By giving myself more time to do nothing, to not have any obligations, it gave me the room to approach my active moments more gratefully and energetically. I did have to do a lot less than I was doing before. I do have to see people less often. I absolutely had to find a metric of success beyond an online presence. Now, I get more things done that matter to me with greater joy because I feel rested enough to gravitate towards what gives me meaning.
I'm spending time with people who are uplifting and uplifted when we're together, instead of seeing people because they "need" me to show up x number of times to be considered a true friend.
Right now, I'm experiencing job creep, and I still feel centered because I prioritize sustainable balanced work, rest and play. I am not about nonstop productivity or nonstop emotional labor. If it's not sustainable, it's not for me, and I will forge a new path creatively like I always do.
What do you think made those things (listed above) possible?
What helped me shift most was seeing myself as a whole person. I'm not just my passion or my role at work or to my loved ones. I'm also my health, my basic needs, my home, my sense of safety, my need to experiment and make mistakes and explore, my work ethic, a cat person. All of me needs care.
If I need to cut back on one area of my life, it's not because I'm failing. It's because I'm taking care of multiple parts of me.
I figured out the ratio of work, rest and play that make me happiest.
I figured out what types of play and rest do the most for me.
I figured out the type of work and social environments that enable me to thrive and give more.
I learned to trust the practice that when I'm relaxed and rested, I have so much more effortless energy than when I'm trying too hard. It felt really counterintuitive, as I'm so used to anxiously doing the most.
To know that I can be loved and enough by doing less is my healing journey.
The people who believe in overworking and overgiving are not going to come with me into my easefully abundant future.
What would you say to someone thinking about working with Becca?
Becca completely raised the bar for me of what to expect from a coach.
There are many life coaches out there who aren't going to fit you because they are selling you their results and their methods. If you want their life, then it's perfect. But what if you don't know what you want or if your desires keep changing from where you started? What if you don't know what methods will work for your unique brain and lifestyle? What if you want to do many things, in a world that keeps telling you to pick one habit and do it for 2 minutes daily? How does that add up to being a sustainably multipassionate person!
I love that Becca isn't trying to help me manage my time to be a creative spiritual entrepreneur. She helped me take care of my whole self so I can handle my many passions and stressors in a way that's more realistic to my life and personality.
And her approach isn't some mysteriously paywalled method. She takes the time to deeply hear your heart's aim and your rhythms, and to make your calendar match your truth and your everchanging reality. I think in this hectic world, it is a radical act to take the time to truly know ourselves. She'll give you that time.
Experience and enjoy balance in your own life.
Book a complimentary 30-min exploration call here.
5 Life lessons learned as a full-time traveling entrepreneur in 2022
This year was an adventure.
I started 2022 dancing in Ljubljana, the capital of Slovenia. We spent the winter venturing through Italy–Trieste, Venice, Florence, and Rome. We went on to meet great friends in Porto, Portugal in February.
Took a trip to the US to visit family (and a short detour in Mexico) over the spring. Hopped back across the pond to spend the summer in Madeira, Portugal with said friends from Porto.
For the fall season, we checked out of the Schengen Zone and to Croatia where we visited Dubrovnik, Hvar, and Zagreb.
Now I’m writing this from Greece where we’ll be celebrating Christmas, and ringing in the first two months of 2023 in Cyprus.
This year I will have traveled to 11 countries, and I would say lived in (trips longer than a week) 5 countries.
All while running a successful online coaching business.
After taking a moment to pause and reflect on 2022, here are my life lessons learned this year. (In no particular order).
As well as how I’ll take each lesson ahead into the new year with me to continue growing and thriving.
Life lessons learned in 2022
This is the third time I’m doing a yearly recap, which means I’m approaching 3 years as a holistic time management coach this upcoming January! Woohoo!
As someone whose main passion in life is to just be more of herself, it’s really cool to be able to go back and read past life lessons. It’s amazing to see my healing and progress and say, “Yep! I’m still living and now teaching these lessons I learned two years ago.”
<<Read my life lessons learned in 2021 and 2020>>
Here’s to all of us becoming more of ourselves! 🥂✨
Life Lesson One: Get comfy with uncertainty.
As a digital nomad, I have no idea where I’ll live two months from now. As a business owner, I have no guarantee of a paycheck. When I first started traveling full-time back in July 2020, the uncertainty was absolutely terrifying. To the point of losing hair, tears, and many sleepless nights.
I wanted to be in as much control of my life as I feel like I could be. I wanted to feel at home within myself, no matter where in the world I was. Most importantly, I wanted to get out of my box and see the world. And all of those desires continued to outweigh my anxiety and worry, so I kept on.
It took about 2 years of traveling full-time to get to the place where I landed this summer: Comfortable with uncertainty. At one point, I had no idea where I was going to live the next week. I’ve learned how to be okay with not knowing where I’ll live or where my next client comes from.
I trust that no matter what, I can and will figure it out.
This is a huge, massive, ginormous life lesson that’s taken a lot to learn. However, the amount of peace that I live with is totally worth the effort. So with this, I plan to continue to travel in 2023, let the places I want to live call to me, run my business, and see what happens.
Though, if you’re like, “Yo, you went to an extreme for this life lesson…” you’re right. This leads me to lesson number two.
Life Lesson Two. Find the gray zone.
Black-or-white thinking sucks.
For example, hustle culture and anti-hustle culture. Hustle culture tells us we are worthy if we work all the time, feel exhausted, disregard needing breaks, and neglect our health. Anti-hustle culture says if we’re working hard, we’re doing it wrong. Success in business is somewhere in the messy middle.
Another example, oppressive society and culture tell us we have no agency over our time. Spiritual gurus gaslight us and tell us we have complete agency over our time. The agency we have is somewhere in the messy middle.
Want another? Rigidity versus openness. We’ve been taught time management, structure, and schedules need to be super rigid. Due to anti-hustle culture, many of us have tossed out all structure in the seek for freedom. Structure that truly benefits us is somewhere in the messy middle.
Everything we do and are as humans are in the messy middle ground. The balance between masculine and feminine or yin and yang. As I approach the new year, I want to use this life lesson learned to be even more creative with solutions to any frustration, new ideas, places to travel, and just life in general.
Life Lesson Three. I create my own time paradigm.
As I travel across time zones and cultures, I realize more than ever how deep the societal construct of time runs within us. From what time we should wake up, eat meals, work, and go to bed… it’s all made up. And vaguely changes depending on what country you’re in.
You could make your new year tomorrow if you wanted. Literally.
Of course, with a “normal” job and external constraints, the more you’ll live in society’s construct of time. However, over the last 2.5 years, I have been reclaiming more and more agency over my time (see lesson 2) by choosing how much I want to subscribe to society’s time construct.
The more I define and live within my own time construct, the more manageable my life feels.
So as of now, I’m taking this lesson learned by fully stepping into cyclical planning with my astrological chart. No more going back and forth between the moons and the gregorian calendar.
What this looks like is: I’ll be essentially letting go of months in the traditional sense and planning completely aligned with each new moon. My “new year” will be celebrated on July 23rd, the Leo (my ascendant) new moon.
I’m allowing things on a day-to-day level, and a macro level to take as much time as they want to take. I’m learning more about mother earth and indigenous wisdom.
Life Lesson Four. This shit really works.
As I enter my fourth year of developing holistic time management and coaching people, I am still astounded every time one of my clients creates literal magic.
From starting podcasts, writing books, making tons of money, starting businesses, traveling the world, managing teams more effectively, healing deep wounds, and creating trust and safety within. I’ve witnessed so many amazing humans accomplish deeply meaningful goals and finally be the person they want to be all because they teamed up with time.
Absolutely magical. ✨
Not to brag or anything, but on a personal note, I feel like everyone right about now (late Nov/early Dec) is t.i.r.e.d. where I’m feeling really energized and good. I’ve taken lots of breaks, short and long, throughout the year. I’ve imperfectly stayed balanced while focused on and aligned with my priorities.
I knew this before, but this year I feel like I finally understand it on a deeper, more holistic level with each day and with each person I get to work with.
With this life lesson, I plan to continue healing my own time misunderstandings and doing this deeply meaningful and important work of holistic time coaching.
Life Lesson Five. My home is inside of me.
In November this year, as I traveled on a Bus from Croatia to Bosnia, it finally hit me. There are buses, trees, roads, dogs, construction, and clouds everywhere on this planet.
The only thing that stays constant throughout is me. My heart. My mind. My body.
This life lesson may seem obvious, but it wasn't to me as someone who sought her worthiness and fulfillment through productivity and achievements. My happiness and peace were dependent on my external success and the approval of others.
If this year has taught me anything, what keeps me healthy and makes me successful is listening to myself, my joy, and my gut. Period.
I can leave places and situations that suck. I can speak up for myself. I can do what I need to do to feel safe.
It’s my job to build a strong home for myself, and protect it at all costs.
This is what holistic time management is all about, and I’m excited to see what the next 6 months bring as I now celebrate the new year in July!
What lessons did you learn in 2022?
I’d love to hear in the comments below or send me a DM on Instagram.
Is 2023 the year you get more intentional around your time?
Click here to learn how time coaching can help you thrive in the coming year.
Time management coaches are more important now than ever before: Here’s why
Life is beautiful and fragile.
Being human is amazing and challenging.
Staying true to ourselves is essential for living each of our one lifetimes with the most fulfillment, happiness, and health.
It's easier than ever before in our world to become consumed by all of our to-do lists, distracted by what other people are doing, and lose touch with ourselves.
A holistic time management coach is someone you can hire to make your life so much easier by supporting you with making time for, staying focused on, and being present with the things that matter most to you.
If you’ve been wondering what you can do to make more of your time and life, continue reading to find out why a time management coach is more important than ever before.
Time management coaches: An antidote to the state of the world
We’ve been living in an increasingly demanding and uncertain world that moves and evolves faster every single day.
American psychiatrist Edward Hallowell goes so far as to say, ‘Never in human history have our brains had to work with so much information as they do today… We have a generation of people who are so busy processing the information received from all directions that they are losing the ability to think and feel.’
Our societies are fighting against a global pandemic, the attention economy, burnout, overworking, addiction, individual and collective trauma, and so much more.
54% Gen Xers are burned out, whereas 68% of working moms are burned out (source).
As a result of the pandemic, it appears to me that we are collectively rethinking many things… one of which is the way we work and live.
I believe that’s why 47.4 million people have voluntarily left their jobs for better work (CNBC).
We are after more flexible working conditions, better wages, and a better quality of life overall.
More than ever, we have tuned into the fact that we have this one human life to make the most of.
And I don’t know about you, but I want an extraordinary one full of connection, purpose, impact, and meaning.
A time management coach is here to partner up with you to make the most out of your life.
Not your average time management coach
When the majority of people think about time management, being a productive superhuman at work and sometimes, at home, comes to mind.
I get tired just thinking about the way I used to think about time management.
However, here at The Holistic Time Coach, we’re about shifting our perception around time management.
Time is the fabric of life, and our humanness.
Time is the medium for meeting our needs.
Consciously choosing to spend our time is the most important thing we can ever do.
Time management, the kind that’s not just about being more productive at work, is about being a good steward of our life force.
Collaborating with time allows us to do all the things that are deeply meaningful to us and be the person we want to be.
The extraordinary life we crave goes from a distant wish to a real possibility.
Saying goodbye to getting consumed by all the to-do’s, distracted by what other people are doing, and losing touch with ourselves becomes possible too.
A holistic time management coach is someone you can hire to make your life so much easier by supporting you with making time for, staying focused on, and being present with the things that matter most to you.
How does a time management coach actually do that?
As a holistic time management coach, my role has 3 main elements. In order for someone to create and experience an extraordinary life on their terms, I assist someone in:
Playing in the possibilities to identify how and where they truly want to spend their time.
Discovering the unique skills and tools they need in order to spend their time how they want.
Integrating those skills until they become second nature with gentle support and accountability.
Want more details on what I actually do as a holistic time management coach? Click here.
Have you thought about what’s possible for you if you were able to stay focused on what matters most? If you were able to spend the majority of your time doing the things you want to do?
Let me know in the comments below!
Curious about what was possible for the folks I’ve worked with?
Click here to read from the amazing humans, entrepreneurs, and professionals I’ve worked with have said about working with me.
This one small change can make a big difference in your life
When you’re struggling to stay afloat, it’s extremely difficult to make changes.
However, in order to get out of that place, change is non-negotiable.
It’s the conundrum of the dog chasing its own tail.
How do you figure out what change will make the biggest difference?
How do you trust the change you’re making is the right one?
That’s what Jennifer and I’s work together really answered for her.
One of the biggest benefits of getting a coach is talking to someone else from a different place physically, mentally, and emotionally.
As Jennifer’s time coach, I offered a calming and pressure-free space for her to identify the tiny (almost invisible) shifts she needed to make great progress… and she did!
Read more about her journey below and how focusing on just how she used her time made a HUGE difference in her life.
Tell us who you are and what you do.
Hi! I’m Jennifer Garcia, Career Coach & Resume Writer. Best Resume Coach
What was your business and life like before time coaching with me?
I was struggling with staying afloat. I wasn't using my time in the business to move it forward only to barely sustain it.
I felt like I was constantly spinning my wheels and feeling burnt out and, honestly, hopeless.
I wanted to quit my business because I had no time for family or self-care.
You helped me change all that!
What did you love about working together?
I loved how our sessions were so calming! I honestly didn't expect that from a time management/productivity coach.
I expected it to be regimented and clear-cut. While you helped me have a clear vision, you never ever told me what to do or "should" do.
You gave me nudges in the right direction and encouraged me to learn and grow at my own pace. It was beautiful! Really.
I loved how I never felt pressured to get things done. I was already giving that kind of pressure to myself a lot. It was SO reassuring to come into a session with Becca, breathe together, and then trust that by making tiny (almost invisible) shifts I was going to make great progress. and I did! We did it together! That was so cool!
THANK YOU!!
I feel like the tools I have learned now can last me forever. You're so gifted as a coach and strong as a leader. I am so happy and thankful to work with you.
What has happened in your life or business since we worked together?
On month 1, week 1 I felt really skeptical (another thing I'm gonna fizzle out on). By month 2 I had some momentum. By month 3, I was pleasantly surprised to have reached my biggest goal!!
You helped me create more momentum and bring in more money in my business. It was really quite magical!
My business generated my monthly goal as a stay-at-home mom and part-time worker.
In my life, I have been calmer and let go of the anger and fears that held me back before.
I have time for rest, and better freaking sleep!! I am sleeping in now and not regretting it. I don’t feel behind or judgmental first thing when I wake up.
Better physical health, a better marital relationship, and better family relationships with my kids and with my siblings, parents, and friends.
I also have a better relationship with myself! I am now so much kinder to myself.
What do you think made those things (listed above) possible?
Trust and faith.
I had to believe in you and trust that you are capable and leading me on the right path to success. But ultimately, learning to trust myself and my own intuition. Being more open to (and ready for) having joy and fun in my life.
See yourself in Jennifer’s story and feel ready to see similar changes in your life? Click here to schedule a pressure-free consult call now.
How to Delegate So You Fall In Love with Your Business Again
It’s exciting starting and growing your own business, isn’t it? It’s an opportunity to create something exactly as you envision it.
No one is there to tell you what to do or how to do it. It’s your baby to nurture and develop and give you the freedom to be yourself.
But all too often, reality sets in. And it’s not always a great reality. Your baby is demanding. There are so many things to do.
So many behind-the-scenes tasks it takes to run a business that you weren’t exactly thinking about when you pursued your passion.
Tasks that aren’t necessarily in your zone of genius and are taking way longer than you know they should.
So there you are with this amazing thing you’ve created, but you’re tired. You’re stressed, you’re overwhelmed, you’re headed for burnout (or maybe you’re already there), and you might even feel like shutting it all down.
If it’s any comfort telling you you’re not alone, please know that is true. I’ve seen it time and again with the business owners I work with.
So many of us are extremely capable and could probably win a multi-tasking contest if there was such a thing. We figure, hey, I’m great at getting lots of things done, so that’s what I’ll do in my business - all the things.
But guess what? Doing everything in your business is exactly what you should not be doing. In this post, I’ll be stepping you through a simple delegation process that I take my clients through.
Written by: Cory Zacker
Learning how to delegate
The key to a successful business that can grow and flourish is learning how to delegate. If you get clear on the tasks you love doing most (and that light you up) and get even more clear on the things that drain you, you’ll be well on your way to improving your delegation skills.
And hear me when I tell you this: assigning tasks to someone else does not mean you’re any less worthy. It does not mean you’re lazy or incompetent or less than. It means you understand what you do best and are willing to entrust someone else with those things you want to let go of. That’s a big part of the mindset of delegating and something I encourage you to embrace.
Assigning tasks to someone else
So how do you get clarity on what exactly you want to pass on to someone else? I like to use a simple strategy I call the Yea, Nay, Give Away exercise. It’s concise, clear, and will probably take no more than 15 minutes to complete.
Make three columns on a piece of paper (or a document on your computer) and label them Yea, Nay, and Give Away.
Yea
In the Yea column, list those things you love doing in your business. The tasks that energize you and come easy. For me it’s face-to-face client work, networking with colleagues, and writing. Those are three of the things that light me up.
Nay
In the Nay column, list the ones that take too much time and sap your energy. Things you might not be that great at and resent spending your time doing. (Remember, you might add a few personal things in this column that are taking you away from your business, e.g., cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc.)
This one is easy for me. Numbers are important in any business, but they’re just not my thing. I pay attention to them, but I don’t want to spend time doing my bookkeeping and accounting myself. It doesn’t come naturally to me and it takes way too much time.
Give Away
Then in the Give Away column, choose some items from the Nay list that you can either get rid of altogether or delegate to someone else. (Hello, accountant!)
Once you have your Give Away items, take a good look at them and figure out who or what can help you. Would hiring a virtual assistant for a few hours a week take care of some of those tasks? Or maybe a babysitter/mother’s helper can tick a few of those boxes. Can a bookkeeper take over your billing? Or maybe a tech person could set up automation for you.
Why delegating actually makes you money
When you get clarity on what you need and who can help you, delegating doesn’t seem so hard. I’ve seen just a few hours a week of hiring help make a huge difference in someone’s business.
Take Sherri - an amazing woman I know with a hugely successful business. She was doing everything herself and was overworked and overwhelmed. Once we figured out who she needed to hire and what tasks she was going to delegate, Sherri had way more time to nurture her current clients and find new ones. Within a month of hiring a project manager, she was able to sign a new client who paid 5x what Sherri was paying her new team member. So delegating actually made her money.
What assigning tasks to others can do for you
So what does delegating in your business bring you?
Time - sweet, delicious, abundant time just for you. Time to not only rest and recharge, but to do what you love doing (remember that Yea list?).
Growth - yup, it’s true. With more time on your hands, you’ll be able to nurture your leads, create new offers, and reach more potential clients. I’ve seen it happen.
Peace of mind - fewer tasks equals less stress. Less stress equals a calmer you.
You created your business out of passion. So I’m inviting you to take some time to make more time for this thing you love. And more time to step away from it when you need to. (And it’s okay to need to.)
Let’s try to eliminate the word solopreneur, shall we? There’s no reason to do it all by yourself and learning how to delegate is the key to falling back in love with your business.
Want to feel confident, in control, and at peace with your time? Click here to get free + supportive resources!
About the contributor
Cory Zacker is a business consultant and strategist, as well as a certified Positive Psychology coach. She helps brilliant service providers grow, nurture, and manage their business with personalized growth strategies and business mindset coaching. With over 20 years of entrepreneurial experience, Cory uses her business wisdom plus her warmth and humor to help entrepreneurs align with their core values, simplify their systems, and manage and grow their teams all while reducing the stress and overwhelm of growing their thriving business.
How to achieve your goals and feel well-rested (yes, it's possible!)
It feels extremely counter-productive to focus on rest and health FIRST, then our to-do lists.
We’ve been taught to get everything done, and then we can take a break.
What happens when it’s literally impossible to get everything done? Cause that’s the truth. You will never get everything done.
We stay exhausted, running on a treadmill of tasks hoping for one day when we can breathe.
That’s where traditional time management extremely suffers, and holistic time management excels.
When you put yourself first, like legit first, and everything else after… achieving your goals and feeling well-rested becomes a reality.
Finally!
Find out how Kirsten was able to put herself first while accomplishing even more than she set out to in our 3-months working together.
Since this post is more of a case study than a how-to, don’t miss the coaching questions at the end of this post to apply Kirsten’s wisdom and transformation to your life and business.
Tell us who you are and what you do.
Kirsten Welge, Founder/Director of Natural Awareness, LLC
What was achieving your personal and professional goals like before you began working with me?
After leaving my corporate healthcare manager position of 5 years for a 6 month 'sabbatical', I was struggling to set a daily routine that helped me complete deeply important goals AND left me feeling well-rested.
I relied on deadlines and a buildup of external and internal pressure to move me - which didn't translate well to cleaning the home or completing other "maintenance behaviors" necessary for life to run smoothly.
What did you love about having me as your holistic time coach?
Your check-ins strongly supported accountability.
Mindful breathing to start our sessions.
Experiencing your presence – you're gentle and accepting, which helped me to soften my approach to myself.
The invitations to try things out and see how they worked for me (like bedtime rituals).
Your approach to time management and the calendar make-over!!! <3 That was life-changing.
What has happened in your life or business since we worked together?
In my life…
I realized my body does cue me when it's tired -- and I am practicing setting a rhythm to settle towards a regular sleep time of 9-9:30 PM. (A far cry from working until 3 AM!!)
I began to listen more to my body, and nap when it asks me for rest. I feel more refreshed and relaxed.
I accepted that I am not a robot that can produce indefinitely at the same rate, regardless of feelings or circumstances.
I donated a trunk full of bags of items to Goodwill, and donated another 40 pieces of business clothes (suits, pants, jackets, shells, blouses) to a local group that sets up low-income women with interview & business clothing.
I cleared the main floor space of our home - AND KEPT IT CLEAN with maintenance of 5-10 min every evening. WOW! ...and this led to a huge breakthrough and more trust with my partner. Thank you!
I cleared a space in the basement for my "recording studio" for a national talk.
I prepared and delivered a national talk to my aikido federation on why I train, and how our training can be applied in daily life.
I completed a series of biweekly bike rides (including time trials, hill climbs, and gravel rides I'd never done before) on 10-40k+ routes from June-August.
I developed muscles and speed I have never had before.
I completed a 10-day solo Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness trip, with portaging (never done before), and found greater clarity and trust in my mind-body than ever before. I had no regrets whatsoever about spending that time alone.
In my business…
I opened up to being OK with not producing an income with every action I took.
I worked through anxiety about comparing myself to how others did things.
I worked through anxiety & resistance about offering certain classes, made clear, confident decisions, and experienced greater ease and alignment.
For Q4, I reduced my number of quarterly goals to THREE, from more than 8... and am seeing progress on those three fronts, instead of feeling like a hamster trying to spin multiple wheels. Awesome!!
Thanks to your calendar makeover, I now have large time blocks for focusing on a particular group of tasks. This is SO helpful!
And, I've built in time for daily activities to settle me and connect me to my partner and friends, which often fell to the wayside in the past.
I filed for my LLC!!!
And, I finally put together a site for my business and flier for my first program, Track Your Backyard! I have learned so much and now have a functioning website. AWESOME.
What do you think made those things (listed above) possible in just 3 months of working together?
Focusing on rest and health first.
When I'm rested, I have a greater awareness of myself and what's needed, short- and long-term - and I am more efficient and effective at completing what's needed.
Boom. ^That’s the key right there.
But how?! How do we make this massive shift in how we manage and think about time?
Here are some coaching questions for you to think through:
How might you put yourself first, and everything else second (or later)?
What might be keeping you from being able to do that?
What is your next best step forward?
Want to achieve all your deeply meaningful goals without feeling exhausted and overwhelmed?
Let’s make it happen! Click here to schedule a no-pressure consult call now.
Want to know what I learned this year? My 5 Biggest lessons from 2021
If I had to say one main truth about being on this planet, it’s this:
Life is about learning.
It’s the reason we go to school as kids. In fact, now that I say that… life IS a school.
This makes me giggle now as an adult because ever since I can remember, I loved school. I loved the scent of fresh new books, organizing my planner, and the energy of possibilities.
But just because I loved school, doesn’t mean it was easy.
Just like life, it takes desire, effort, time, dedication, and repetition to learn and more importantly, integrate what we learn.
That’s why I do these year recap blog posts.
One so I can share and connect with you. Two so I can go back, recognize my own progress next year, and continue integrating lessons. Wanna see what I learned in 2020? Click here.
Here’s to us learning, integrating, and living together. 🌱
What I learned this year
(In no particular order)
1) Good rest is the cure
Rest is one of those things that everyone should do more. Especially nowadays with the great resignation and antiwork movements. We’re all preaching rest, rest, rest.
Since burning out in 2013, I’ve been learning and teaching others how to slow down, rest, and heal internalized hustle. I am a rest preacher and truly believe deep down that pausing, resting, taking care of ourselves is the cure to every modern problem we face.
However this year, I integrated this lesson into my bones. In may I was playing tennis with my little brothers while I was home (I never play tennis), and I fell while running after a ball. I thought I rolled my ankle.
My husband told me to try walking on it. I tried, but my body said absolutely not. I went to urgent care and found out, sadly, I broke a bone in my foot.
For the next 4 weeks, I didn’t put a single ounce of weight on my foot. I truly rested it. Then the following 4, I slowly reintegrated weight without trying to push myself.
When it comes to resting most of us rest a little, then feel a lot better and rush back to our to-do lists. We rarely get past that point and experience deep, good, true rest. At least I didn’t prior to 2021.
This year and particular experience taught me about the kind of rest that feels uncomfortable. That feels like our skin is kind of crawling. The rest that makes you feel all the feelings always bubbling beneath the surface, ready and waiting to surface.
And yet, when you get past those initial feelings and get to the good rest…the healing, the renewal, and the peace that comes forth is everything you’ve been looking for.
2) Clear communication is key to business + life
This year I spend quite a lot of time and money learning how to communicate better.
I got so much clarity on my messaging in my business with the help of Lindsay, from Forza Collective. And I graduated from the best holistic coaching certification program ever (in my opinion of course), and am currently in the process of becoming an ICF-certified coach.
I learned just how important communication is for a successful business, relationship, and pretty much…life.
My communication is still a work in progress, as I believe it will always be. But this year I learned how to communicate with so much more clarity, confidence, and ease.
3) Self-expression is my true goal (and vulnerable AF)
When starting a business or embarking on any goal in life, knowing what you really want is something I learned this year.
As humans, we can easily create external measures of success that aren’t actually success to us. For example, as business owners, it’s easy to set a goal (financial or otherwise) because we see others setting similar goals. I’m looking at you… “The American Dream.”
What often happens is we spend a ton of time, energy, money, and precious life working towards that goal to later realize we still aren’t content.
Wouldn’t it be much easier to figure out what success really looked like, instead of waiting until that really de-stabilizing and sorta, depressing point? That’s what I’ve been learning in 2021.
While yes, I need money to pay my bills and take care of myself… when money comes in, I can still feel empty. What I’ve realized success actually looks like is being able to fully express myself (aka communicate), be creative and feel free, and be seen and heard by loved ones and people in my community.
True self-expression is another story, and something I’m focusing on now and in the next year!
4) How to validate myself
Prior to 2021, I was using social media and others to validate myself. That need for validation was a rocky and toxic relationship that I was desperate to get out of.
That’s one of the reasons why I made my word for 2021 was held.
I wanted to learn how to be with myself when difficult situations and emotions arose. I knew holding myself would be the key to letting go of past hurts, doing hard things with more ease, and expressing myself more authentically.
Validating and holding myself has been a work in progress for years but this year was a year of embodying this. I’m also extremely grateful to have Susan Pitler, an amazing somatic therapist, and other groups to support me in this journey.
This year, I’ve learned what it’s like to validate and deeply care for the tender part in my heart. And I learned what it’s like when I forget to validate myself and how much I’m not interested in living a life of shame, guilt, and shoulds.
I’m so grateful for the ability to validate myself in order to express myself and communicate even more in 2022.
5) Trusting me and the universe is a process
We’ve all been on a journey of reckoning with uncertainty over the last 2 years, and I’m no different. When life is uncertain, our tendency is to control as much as possible.
For the business owners I work with and myself that attempt at control looks like rushing around, pushing towards our goals, and scarcity thinking.
The antidote? Trust.
Trusting ourselves, and if you’re spiritual, trusting the universe/higher power/source/your God.
I’ve known this for quite some time, but this year I learned more about the process of trust, what it looks like, and red flags for when I’m lacking in trust.
Anytime I remember and relax into trust, everything feels so much easier.
How can you make your life easier?
To summarize, 2021 has been a year about making my life easier through deeply caring for myself–whether that looks like communicating better, resting, validating myself, or trusting the universe.
Have you reflected on your year and figured out what you’ve learned yet? If not, I have a blog post of self-reflection questions for an end-of-the-year review session. Click here to find out your 2021 lessons now.